00:00:01.238 --> 00:00:04.321
(indistinct chatter)

00:00:13.066 --> 00:00:14.733
- [Linda] Can we go?

00:00:16.409 --> 00:00:19.492
(indistinct chatter)

00:00:30.172 --> 00:00:31.756
what's the third part?

00:00:31.756 --> 00:00:35.112
- On this part, we are
going to say something like,

00:00:35.112 --> 00:00:40.112
we like to have a big family
and we like Chinese culture.

00:00:40.448 --> 00:00:43.811
That's why we come here
to adopt a Chinese baby.

00:00:43.811 --> 00:00:47.353
And then we will promise
we will not abandon her,

00:00:47.353 --> 00:00:49.984
we will not mistreat her.

00:00:49.984 --> 00:00:53.360
And we will give her good
education and bright future.

00:00:53.360 --> 00:00:55.593
Very simple like this.

00:00:55.593 --> 00:00:58.676
(indistinct chatter)

00:01:02.577 --> 00:01:03.624
- [Camera Person] Ready?

00:01:03.624 --> 00:01:04.470
- No.

00:01:04.470 --> 00:01:06.032
(Linda and her husband laugh)

00:01:06.032 --> 00:01:08.949
(background noise)

00:01:10.930 --> 00:01:14.352
(people applauding)

00:01:14.352 --> 00:01:16.852
(tense music)

00:01:22.356 --> 00:01:24.856
(baby crying)

00:01:32.768 --> 00:01:35.435
(hopeful music)

00:01:39.479 --> 00:01:42.207
(upbeat music)

00:01:42.207 --> 00:01:44.635
- [Linda] This is me
and my daughter, Ruby.

00:01:44.635 --> 00:01:46.132
She's 10 months old.

00:01:46.132 --> 00:01:48.015
(upbeat music)

00:01:48.015 --> 00:01:49.731
She'll have so many questions

00:01:49.731 --> 00:01:51.864
that I won't be able to answer.

00:01:51.864 --> 00:01:53.735
And I wonder, how will I be able

00:01:53.735 --> 00:01:56.132
to help her build a
strong sense of identity

00:01:56.132 --> 00:01:57.827
when there are so many missing pieces

00:01:57.827 --> 00:01:59.596
from the early parts of her life?

00:01:59.596 --> 00:02:01.708
(upbeat music)

00:02:01.708 --> 00:02:03.908
To find those answers,
I have to meet the girls

00:02:03.908 --> 00:02:06.877
who have already walked in her shoes.

00:02:06.877 --> 00:02:09.210
So for three years, I
filmed four teenagers

00:02:09.210 --> 00:02:12.048
from across the US to
hear about their lives

00:02:12.048 --> 00:02:13.368
in their own voices.

00:02:13.368 --> 00:02:15.712
(upbeat music)

00:02:15.712 --> 00:02:17.328
This film is for Ruby.

00:02:17.328 --> 00:02:19.911
(upbeat music)

00:02:24.711 --> 00:02:27.718
- You can't be a world
power without enough people,

00:02:27.718 --> 00:02:30.603
but with too many people,
you don't stand a chance.

00:02:30.603 --> 00:02:31.860
That's how China sees things.

00:02:31.860 --> 00:02:34.424
And Bruce Dunning reports
on what it's doing about it.

00:02:34.424 --> 00:02:37.404
- [Bruce] The sheer mass of
it's more than 1 billion people,

00:02:37.404 --> 00:02:40.813
strains the country's ability
to provide even adequate food

00:02:40.813 --> 00:02:42.100
and housing for all,

00:02:42.100 --> 00:02:45.060
let alone develop much needed industries.

00:02:45.060 --> 00:02:50.060
So this is a sign of the
times, one family, one child.

00:02:50.198 --> 00:02:52.781
(somber music)

00:03:26.169 --> 00:03:27.106
- [Camera Person] You have to (indistinct)

00:03:27.106 --> 00:03:28.155
- Yes, yes.

00:03:28.155 --> 00:03:28.988
- [Camera Person] Okay.

00:03:28.988 --> 00:03:31.071
- Jez, Jez, Jez, help me.

00:03:32.077 --> 00:03:34.187
(indistinct chatter)

00:03:34.187 --> 00:03:35.324
- Nothing since.

00:03:35.324 --> 00:03:36.605
- [Party Attendee] Christmas
and then trying to get-

00:03:36.605 --> 00:03:38.314
- Okay (speaks foreign language).

00:03:38.314 --> 00:03:42.731
(people singing in foreign language)

00:03:54.886 --> 00:03:56.517
- [Party Attendees] Happy birthday to you.

00:03:56.517 --> 00:03:59.148
Happy birthday to you.

00:03:59.148 --> 00:04:03.231
Happy birthday dear Jenni,
happy birthday to you.

00:04:07.117 --> 00:04:10.353
(party attendees clapping)

00:04:10.353 --> 00:04:14.125
- My name is Fang, that's
what my family calls me.

00:04:14.125 --> 00:04:17.457
In school they call me Jenni,
that's my American name.

00:04:17.457 --> 00:04:21.707
(party attendees applaud and clap)

00:04:23.013 --> 00:04:26.773
I was adopted when I was five years old

00:04:26.773 --> 00:04:30.023
a week from five actually, to be exact.

00:04:30.933 --> 00:04:35.456
And I don't know if that's,
April 25th is my birthday, 1993.

00:04:35.456 --> 00:04:37.556
I don't know if that's my exact birthday.

00:04:37.556 --> 00:04:39.140
I doubt it is

00:04:39.140 --> 00:04:43.747
because the orphanage
gives kids their birthdays.

00:04:43.747 --> 00:04:44.580
- Okay.

00:04:45.892 --> 00:04:48.948
- [Fang] I can cut the cake.

00:04:48.948 --> 00:04:50.491
I'm grown up mum.

00:04:50.491 --> 00:04:52.100
(indistinct chatter)

00:04:52.100 --> 00:04:55.059
I feel like I've been 15 for a long time.

00:04:55.059 --> 00:04:55.892
- [Party Attendee] Not a good idea.

00:04:55.892 --> 00:04:57.524
- My age is estimated, you know,

00:04:57.524 --> 00:05:00.076
and when you're found on the street,

00:05:00.076 --> 00:05:04.321
they just make you as young
as you possibly can pass by

00:05:04.321 --> 00:05:08.357
because the older you are,
the less appealing it is.

00:05:08.357 --> 00:05:10.724
So I don't really know
what my real age is,

00:05:10.724 --> 00:05:13.807
but I don't feel like I'm turning 15.

00:05:15.287 --> 00:05:18.530
- [Camera Person] Okay, I
am recording, we are coming.

00:05:18.530 --> 00:05:20.117
We're here guys.

00:05:20.117 --> 00:05:22.220
We are in coming.

00:05:22.220 --> 00:05:23.698
Try to hold this steady.

00:05:23.698 --> 00:05:26.105
We're at the orphanage.

00:05:26.105 --> 00:05:30.025
- So in April of 1998, I flew to Kunming.

00:05:30.025 --> 00:05:32.830
Kunming is in the
Southwestern part of China.

00:05:32.830 --> 00:05:34.491
In the interim of waiting for her,

00:05:34.491 --> 00:05:36.410
I decided that I didn't
wanna adopt an older child

00:05:36.410 --> 00:05:38.041
without being able to
communicate with her.

00:05:38.041 --> 00:05:40.244
So I studied Mandarin privately.

00:05:40.244 --> 00:05:44.061
And by the time I
adopted her a year later,

00:05:44.061 --> 00:05:46.037
I could talk to her.

00:05:46.037 --> 00:05:49.061
(chatter in foreign language)

00:05:49.061 --> 00:05:51.370
- I remember the day
before my adoption day,

00:05:51.370 --> 00:05:52.848
my mom came to visit me.

00:05:52.848 --> 00:05:55.728
And I remember her coming
up to me and saying,

00:05:55.728 --> 00:05:57.728
"So Fang, I'm your mom."

00:05:58.578 --> 00:06:01.063
And I looked at her,
sort of examined her face

00:06:01.063 --> 00:06:04.167
and said, "Mama," and hugged her.

00:06:04.167 --> 00:06:05.124
- And then right away,

00:06:05.124 --> 00:06:08.224
she just started talking
to me like I was her mom.

00:06:08.224 --> 00:06:13.009
(Fang's mom speaking foreign language)

00:06:13.009 --> 00:06:17.259
(Fang singing in foreign language)

00:06:34.451 --> 00:06:36.644
- [Fang's Mom] Yay.

00:06:36.644 --> 00:06:37.602
- Mama.

00:06:37.602 --> 00:06:38.798
(Fang's mom speaks foreign language)

00:06:38.798 --> 00:06:39.967
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:06:39.967 --> 00:06:42.067
(Fang's mom speaks foreign language)

00:06:42.067 --> 00:06:42.900
- Mama.

00:06:44.379 --> 00:06:47.327
- [Fang's Mom] She is drawing
some wonderful pictures.

00:06:47.327 --> 00:06:48.836
- [Fang] Mama.
- [Fang's Mom] Hey.

00:06:48.836 --> 00:06:50.871
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:06:50.871 --> 00:06:52.658
(Fang's mom speaks foreign language)

00:06:52.658 --> 00:06:54.091
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:06:54.091 --> 00:06:55.149
(Fang's mom speaks foreign language)

00:06:55.149 --> 00:06:55.997
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:06:55.997 --> 00:06:57.470
(Fang's mom speaks foreign language)

00:06:57.470 --> 00:06:59.517
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:06:59.517 --> 00:07:01.166
(Fang's mom speaks foreign language)

00:07:01.166 --> 00:07:02.063
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:07:02.063 --> 00:07:04.028
She's drawing the whole family.

00:07:04.028 --> 00:07:08.406
Fang Fang was our first
child adopted from China.

00:07:08.406 --> 00:07:11.684
After she had been home
for four or five months,

00:07:11.684 --> 00:07:14.654
my husband said, "I really think we need

00:07:14.654 --> 00:07:17.098
to adopt another one 'cause
the sun, the moon, the earth,

00:07:17.098 --> 00:07:19.317
everything is revolving around this child.

00:07:19.317 --> 00:07:21.826
And she is so confident
and full of herself.

00:07:21.826 --> 00:07:24.742
And I think that we
should adopt her a sister.

00:07:24.742 --> 00:07:26.589
I don't think she should
be an only child."

00:07:26.589 --> 00:07:28.130
I said, "Fine with me."

00:07:28.130 --> 00:07:29.952
(indistinct chatter)

00:07:29.952 --> 00:07:31.209
(fridge door closes)

00:07:31.209 --> 00:07:33.709
Her sister Jiawen, she's a year older.

00:07:33.709 --> 00:07:37.042
And our third child was adopted in 2004.

00:07:39.790 --> 00:07:41.372
And we call her Ching Ching.

00:07:41.372 --> 00:07:43.654
(Fang's elder sister
speaks foreign language)

00:07:43.654 --> 00:07:45.105
- It's kinda quiet without daddy.

00:07:45.105 --> 00:07:46.965
- I know, but-

00:07:46.965 --> 00:07:48.691
- [Fang's Dad] I don't speak any Chinese.

00:07:48.691 --> 00:07:49.524
- He'll be here soon.

00:07:49.524 --> 00:07:53.941
- When the girls came, they
practiced English with me

00:07:54.834 --> 00:07:59.834
and they, as just part of
the day to day interactions,

00:07:59.845 --> 00:08:01.341
they spoke Chinese with Hanni.

00:08:01.341 --> 00:08:03.728
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:08:03.728 --> 00:08:05.257
(Fang and sisters chuckle)

00:08:05.257 --> 00:08:06.929
(hopeful music)

00:08:06.929 --> 00:08:10.173
- It's a blessing to be
able to know your roots

00:08:10.173 --> 00:08:14.727
and be able to know the
people that you came from.

00:08:14.727 --> 00:08:18.413
But in a country of
billions, you can't find.

00:08:18.413 --> 00:08:21.405
It's, the chances are slim.

00:08:21.405 --> 00:08:23.822
(rock music)

00:08:29.221 --> 00:08:32.577
- Everyone else's beginnings
seemed very like sure.

00:08:32.577 --> 00:08:36.575
You never think about why you were born

00:08:36.575 --> 00:08:39.161
into a certain family if
you're just born there

00:08:39.161 --> 00:08:42.459
because physically like,
in science, it makes sense.

00:08:42.459 --> 00:08:44.888
But if you're put there, it's different.

00:08:44.888 --> 00:08:46.761
It's like a different thought.

00:08:46.761 --> 00:08:49.534
- So how was Martin Luther King day?

00:08:49.534 --> 00:08:50.899
- It was good.

00:08:50.899 --> 00:08:51.736
It was really busy

00:08:51.736 --> 00:08:54.159
but it was nice not to have
homework from every class.

00:08:54.159 --> 00:08:55.076
- Oh, yeah.

00:08:56.738 --> 00:09:00.415
- Look at the dog how glad
she is to see you Sara.

00:09:00.415 --> 00:09:02.339
Do you still have homework?

00:09:02.339 --> 00:09:05.536
- I have African history
reading and notes.

00:09:05.536 --> 00:09:07.528
That should be like an
hour and 15 minutes.

00:09:07.528 --> 00:09:09.198
And then I have rest
of my English reading.

00:09:09.198 --> 00:09:10.981
That should be 35 minutes.

00:09:10.981 --> 00:09:14.207
And then I have to study for
my Chinese and physics tests-

00:09:14.207 --> 00:09:15.040
- [Peggy] Which is-

00:09:15.040 --> 00:09:16.921
- And rewrite my English paper.

00:09:16.921 --> 00:09:17.815
- Okay.

00:09:17.815 --> 00:09:18.648
- Yeah.

00:09:18.648 --> 00:09:19.772
- [Peggy] Sorry, you'll be okay.

00:09:19.772 --> 00:09:21.393
- Yeah.
- [Peggy] You're good.

00:09:21.393 --> 00:09:24.966
(Jenna chuckles)

00:09:24.966 --> 00:09:28.799
- I'm pretty much at
school from 7:15 to 7:15.

00:09:30.246 --> 00:09:32.293
Then I get home at 7:45.

00:09:32.293 --> 00:09:34.734
Then I go to bed at 10 and wake up at six.

00:09:34.734 --> 00:09:36.901
So just a really long day.

00:09:37.858 --> 00:09:40.627
I started figure skating
when I was in kindergarten.

00:09:40.627 --> 00:09:42.545
So I've skated for 11 years.

00:09:42.545 --> 00:09:46.010
And I was lucky enough to
go into nationals two times.

00:09:46.010 --> 00:09:49.427
And now my bigger sport at school is crew

00:09:50.325 --> 00:09:53.021
and coxing for some of our boats there.

00:09:53.021 --> 00:09:55.057
Shoulders and up.

00:09:55.057 --> 00:09:57.213
Okay, walk it out.

00:09:57.213 --> 00:09:59.942
Attention, roll three quarters swing up.

00:09:59.942 --> 00:10:00.970
(hopeful music)

00:10:00.970 --> 00:10:02.229
Glide, glide, glide.

00:10:02.229 --> 00:10:03.889
(hopeful music)

00:10:03.889 --> 00:10:06.673
A coxswain isn't supposed
to be like everybody else.

00:10:06.673 --> 00:10:09.697
Like their role is really to
step out and take initiative

00:10:09.697 --> 00:10:13.678
and be the one to like stay
calm when the team is not calm

00:10:13.678 --> 00:10:16.955
and really nervous or
the one to say, you know,

00:10:16.955 --> 00:10:18.891
"We had a hard day today
let's take it easy."

00:10:18.891 --> 00:10:21.090
Or, "I feel like we
really need to push it.

00:10:21.090 --> 00:10:22.687
Let's push ourselves."

00:10:22.687 --> 00:10:25.705
Ride with edges, keep it controlled, nice.

00:10:25.705 --> 00:10:27.305
(hopeful music)

00:10:27.305 --> 00:10:28.697
When we're sitting in the boat,

00:10:28.697 --> 00:10:30.524
the rowers just hears this voice

00:10:30.524 --> 00:10:34.221
and you have to be like very
enthusiastic and encouraging.

00:10:34.221 --> 00:10:36.105
And yet you have to be demanding

00:10:36.105 --> 00:10:38.501
and you always have to demand the best.

00:10:38.501 --> 00:10:41.297
So it's a difficult position to be in,

00:10:41.297 --> 00:10:43.769
but it's pushed me to become better.

00:10:43.769 --> 00:10:46.113
(hopeful music)

00:10:46.113 --> 00:10:50.530
- I adopted Jenna in 1992,
and China had just opened.

00:10:51.469 --> 00:10:55.052
Jenna's always approached
school or a sport

00:11:00.501 --> 00:11:05.334
with great thought and almost
like a job to be done, well.

00:11:08.279 --> 00:11:12.305
- Over heads and roll, try
push it up, push it up,

00:11:12.305 --> 00:11:14.352
straight elbows, all your-

00:11:14.352 --> 00:11:17.013
- Early on, she became very aware

00:11:17.013 --> 00:11:21.492
that she was the only Chinese
child living in a white town.

00:11:21.492 --> 00:11:22.900
If you're always being seen

00:11:22.900 --> 00:11:25.681
and you're never just blending in,

00:11:25.681 --> 00:11:28.124
of course you wanna appear
like you've got everything

00:11:28.124 --> 00:11:32.865
under control and you're
doing everything perfectly.

00:11:32.865 --> 00:11:36.297
Sometimes I've had to encourage
you to just kinda relax

00:11:36.297 --> 00:11:40.214
with things, but it's a
big part of who she is.

00:11:42.128 --> 00:11:44.064
- [Drum Major] And forward, up.

00:11:44.064 --> 00:11:46.647
(parade music)

00:12:05.217 --> 00:12:07.657
- My name is Ann Boccuti, I'm 14.

00:12:07.657 --> 00:12:09.967
I'm in ninth grade and I do color guard

00:12:09.967 --> 00:12:12.135
and I play the piano.

00:12:12.135 --> 00:12:15.360
I started color guard
in about seventh grade.

00:12:15.360 --> 00:12:17.516
It's kind of like a reject sport,

00:12:17.516 --> 00:12:20.720
but you don't wanna say that
'cause people won't join,

00:12:20.720 --> 00:12:22.048
but it's kind of the people

00:12:22.048 --> 00:12:24.096
who don't necessarily always fit in.

00:12:24.096 --> 00:12:26.679
(parade music)

00:12:27.944 --> 00:12:29.746
A lot of kids will look
at me and say I'm Asian.

00:12:29.746 --> 00:12:31.744
But then like if they're my friend

00:12:31.744 --> 00:12:33.592
and it's the first time
they came over my a house

00:12:33.592 --> 00:12:35.759
or something, they'll be kinda surprised

00:12:35.759 --> 00:12:37.926
that my parents are white.

00:12:39.895 --> 00:12:43.767
When you get older, I
think it starts to become

00:12:43.767 --> 00:12:46.231
all of a sudden, you don't
look like your parents

00:12:46.231 --> 00:12:49.112
and all of a sudden that's
some kind of an issue.

00:12:49.112 --> 00:12:50.112
But when you're younger,

00:12:50.112 --> 00:12:53.799
I don't think many kids
will notice that and care

00:12:53.799 --> 00:12:56.692
because to them it's
just a regular family.

00:12:56.692 --> 00:12:59.228
And in many ways it is.

00:12:59.228 --> 00:13:00.704
(car engine revving)

00:13:00.704 --> 00:13:03.853
- See Ann, ask Ann where she came from.

00:13:03.853 --> 00:13:04.686
Say, hi Ann.

00:13:04.686 --> 00:13:05.519
- Hi Ann.

00:13:05.519 --> 00:13:06.352
- Hi.

00:13:06.352 --> 00:13:07.585
- Ask her where she came from.

00:13:07.585 --> 00:13:09.302
- Where you came from?

00:13:09.302 --> 00:13:10.864
- I came from China.

00:13:10.864 --> 00:13:11.697
- Me too.

00:13:14.715 --> 00:13:16.968
- We used to set a place at the table

00:13:16.968 --> 00:13:18.500
for Ann before she came.

00:13:18.500 --> 00:13:21.679
And it was there every night
when we had dinner to remind us

00:13:21.679 --> 00:13:26.679
that eventually there would be
a little girl sitting there.

00:13:27.074 --> 00:13:29.802
- Well, since my parents
already had my brother,

00:13:29.802 --> 00:13:33.310
they had to take a kid who they
thought was more special ed.

00:13:33.310 --> 00:13:36.378
They said that I had X shaped legs.

00:13:36.378 --> 00:13:40.268
My eyes were cross eyed and I
wasn't going to learn as fast.

00:13:40.268 --> 00:13:42.406
But my dad said that when
he looked me in the eyes,

00:13:42.406 --> 00:13:44.073
he said I'd be fine.

00:13:45.318 --> 00:13:47.475
- She made no sounds
when we first got her.

00:13:47.475 --> 00:13:50.502
And she was sweating
because we were in a very,

00:13:50.502 --> 00:13:54.175
in a nice hotel and it had heat
while the orphanage didn't.

00:13:54.175 --> 00:13:57.399
So she wasn't used to a warm
room and it was raining.

00:13:57.399 --> 00:14:00.115
And I opened the windows and
the cold rain blew in on her.

00:14:00.115 --> 00:14:02.162
And she instantly went to sleep.

00:14:02.162 --> 00:14:03.207
When she woke up,

00:14:03.207 --> 00:14:08.065
she gave me a big smile and
that's the way it's been.

00:14:08.065 --> 00:14:10.675
- I was in an orphanage in China.

00:14:10.675 --> 00:14:11.508
- [Woman] Okay.

00:14:11.508 --> 00:14:12.341
- So-

00:14:12.341 --> 00:14:13.743
- [Woman] Do you ever wanna go back?

00:14:13.743 --> 00:14:15.758
- I would wanna go back
to see the orphanage,

00:14:15.758 --> 00:14:18.231
but I'm not very sure I'd
want to see my birth mother.

00:14:18.231 --> 00:14:19.064
- [Woman] Oh yeah.

00:14:19.064 --> 00:14:22.411
- As a possibility, it'd
be quite interesting.

00:14:22.411 --> 00:14:25.095
If I had the preference, I
probably wouldn't meet her,

00:14:25.095 --> 00:14:26.879
but I'd like to go back anyway

00:14:26.879 --> 00:14:28.132
just to see what it's like over there.

00:14:28.132 --> 00:14:29.382
- [Woman] Yeah.

00:14:30.379 --> 00:14:33.306
- In one way, my family's
not like everyone else's

00:14:33.306 --> 00:14:37.066
because I'm not biologically
attached to them.

00:14:37.066 --> 00:14:39.081
In every other way we are,

00:14:39.081 --> 00:14:42.503
like I have chores I have to do.

00:14:42.503 --> 00:14:46.134
We go places, it's a normal family.

00:14:46.134 --> 00:14:48.717
(violin music)

00:14:58.174 --> 00:15:01.309
- I began playing violin when I was three.

00:15:01.309 --> 00:15:04.381
I like singing and performing for people.

00:15:04.381 --> 00:15:05.995
I wanna be the first Chinese person

00:15:05.995 --> 00:15:09.221
to play on the Grand Ole Opry,
that's like my life goal.

00:15:09.221 --> 00:15:11.200
I'm going into the teen pageant

00:15:11.200 --> 00:15:14.401
which is like miss teen,
Tennessee and stuff like that.

00:15:14.401 --> 00:15:15.785
My older sister, Heidi,

00:15:15.785 --> 00:15:18.613
she won miss Nashville
to go to miss Tennessee.

00:15:18.613 --> 00:15:20.552
And that was her picture.

00:15:20.552 --> 00:15:21.659
I like being like my sister.

00:15:21.659 --> 00:15:23.298
She's like the coolest
person in the world,

00:15:23.298 --> 00:15:25.604
but I have to be my own person too.

00:15:25.604 --> 00:15:28.187
(bright music)

00:15:41.608 --> 00:15:44.280
I do feel like I stand out a lot.

00:15:44.280 --> 00:15:45.347
I'm a banana.

00:15:45.347 --> 00:15:48.713
I'm yellow on the outside and
white on the inside. (laughs)

00:15:48.713 --> 00:15:49.912
(shaving machine whirring)

00:15:49.912 --> 00:15:52.013
- Do you get your hair cut?

00:15:52.013 --> 00:15:53.224
- Say my mama does it.

00:15:53.224 --> 00:15:54.468
(shaving machine whirring)

00:15:54.468 --> 00:15:55.968
- My mama does it.

00:15:56.808 --> 00:15:58.039
- [Woman Being Shaved]
(chuckles) You sure are cute.

00:15:58.039 --> 00:15:59.974
- [Haley's Mom] She'll
be three on Thursday

00:15:59.974 --> 00:16:01.030
and Haley is 13.

00:16:01.030 --> 00:16:01.868
(Woman being shaved laughs)

00:16:01.868 --> 00:16:03.450
We said we were on a 10 year plan.

00:16:03.450 --> 00:16:04.687
(Woman being shaved chuckles)

00:16:04.687 --> 00:16:05.937
We then did it.

00:16:07.250 --> 00:16:09.330
- Either you did or nature. (chuckles)

00:16:09.330 --> 00:16:13.234
- Right, well, we did, they're choices.

00:16:13.234 --> 00:16:15.291
- We were adopted.

00:16:15.291 --> 00:16:16.548
- [Woman Being Shaved] Oh, wonderful.

00:16:16.548 --> 00:16:18.521
- [Haley's Mom] They're both from China.

00:16:18.521 --> 00:16:19.952
- Hello, how are you?

00:16:19.952 --> 00:16:20.833
Good to meet you.

00:16:20.833 --> 00:16:22.362
- Can you shake her hand?

00:16:22.362 --> 00:16:26.674
- Congratulations by coming to
the United States of America.

00:16:26.674 --> 00:16:28.257
Yes, are you happy?

00:16:29.149 --> 00:16:32.086
You are, boy aren't you lucky.

00:16:32.086 --> 00:16:34.503
(soft music)

00:16:35.729 --> 00:16:36.993
- People they're like,

00:16:36.993 --> 00:16:40.217
"Oh, you're such a lucky girl
to get to live in America."

00:16:40.217 --> 00:16:43.517
And I'm like, I am really lucky,

00:16:43.517 --> 00:16:46.597
but something bigger than
us had to do with that.

00:16:46.597 --> 00:16:49.014
(soft music)

00:16:57.509 --> 00:17:01.313
I was six months old when I
was adopted from Anhui, China.

00:17:01.313 --> 00:17:03.730
(soft music)

00:17:04.933 --> 00:17:07.045
My mom, when she went over to adopt me,

00:17:07.045 --> 00:17:09.521
she saw that the
orphanages were really bad

00:17:09.521 --> 00:17:11.829
and they weren't fit
for children to live in.

00:17:11.829 --> 00:17:13.457
My mom started Annabelle's Wish.

00:17:13.457 --> 00:17:17.329
And now she's aiding
like 12 or 13 orphanages.

00:17:17.329 --> 00:17:18.506
I've been 12 times.

00:17:18.506 --> 00:17:21.477
And I go back with my mom and
she helps in the orphanages

00:17:21.477 --> 00:17:24.853
and brings stuff and pays
for surgery and education.

00:17:24.853 --> 00:17:27.878
My mom says I'm the starter
because if it weren't for me,

00:17:27.878 --> 00:17:30.947
she wouldn't do, which is pretty cool.

00:17:30.947 --> 00:17:34.819
- I've been back to China
22 more times since 1995.

00:17:34.819 --> 00:17:35.907
And we're currently working

00:17:35.907 --> 00:17:38.966
with approximately 2,000 children.

00:17:38.966 --> 00:17:41.153
We don't go in preaching the Lord.

00:17:41.153 --> 00:17:44.478
If I do, the government
might throw me out.

00:17:44.478 --> 00:17:46.575
And then I can't help
these little children

00:17:46.575 --> 00:17:48.755
that are hungry and naked.

00:17:48.755 --> 00:17:50.755
That's what I wanna do is help those kids.

00:17:50.755 --> 00:17:54.495
I can't, if I'm not in the country.

00:17:54.495 --> 00:17:55.472
- [Children's Teacher] If you're happy

00:17:55.472 --> 00:17:57.367
and you know it shout amen.

00:17:57.367 --> 00:17:58.200
- Amen.

00:17:59.037 --> 00:18:00.107
- [Children's Teacher] If you're happy

00:18:00.107 --> 00:18:01.552
and you know it shout amen.

00:18:01.552 --> 00:18:02.385
- Amen.

00:18:04.104 --> 00:18:05.984
- [Haley] Hey guys, are
you ready for a test?

00:18:05.984 --> 00:18:07.524
- [Boy Puppeteer] Test, what test?

00:18:07.524 --> 00:18:09.440
- [Haley] The spelling
test, didn't you study?

00:18:09.440 --> 00:18:10.273
- [Girl Puppeteer] How about-

00:18:10.273 --> 00:18:11.540
- I was brought up in a Christian home.

00:18:11.540 --> 00:18:13.256
I've gone to church my whole life.

00:18:13.256 --> 00:18:17.203
And even as a Chinese
girl growing up in China,

00:18:17.203 --> 00:18:18.172
if it was meant to be,

00:18:18.172 --> 00:18:21.000
I would've found a way
to being a Christian.

00:18:21.000 --> 00:18:22.804
God has everything for a reason.

00:18:22.804 --> 00:18:24.816
So there must be a
reason that this happened

00:18:24.816 --> 00:18:26.157
and now I'm here.

00:18:26.157 --> 00:18:29.348
And so I think that it's
definitely coming to play

00:18:29.348 --> 00:18:31.560
when you're dealing with adoption.

00:18:31.560 --> 00:18:34.143
(upbeat music)

00:18:35.796 --> 00:18:38.146
(indistinct chatter)

00:18:38.146 --> 00:18:40.729
(upbeat music)

00:18:52.810 --> 00:18:55.371
- You found two images.

00:18:55.371 --> 00:18:58.715
One in the past, one in the present.

00:18:58.715 --> 00:19:00.770
And we're gonna cut them up.

00:19:00.770 --> 00:19:03.353
It could look simple like this.

00:19:04.576 --> 00:19:08.976
All right where kind of one
image cuts into the other one.

00:19:08.976 --> 00:19:11.703
We're forced to deal with

00:19:11.703 --> 00:19:14.938
how the past relates to the present,

00:19:14.938 --> 00:19:18.391
how the present takes from the past.

00:19:18.391 --> 00:19:21.494
(indistinct chatter)
(door closes)

00:19:21.494 --> 00:19:24.244
(dramatic music)

00:19:33.494 --> 00:19:35.178
- People ask me, you know,

00:19:35.178 --> 00:19:38.267
aren't you ever mad at
your Chinese parents?

00:19:38.267 --> 00:19:40.963
I wouldn't be here if it
weren't for the decisions

00:19:40.963 --> 00:19:43.890
that everybody made, especially my mom.

00:19:43.890 --> 00:19:47.585
So, and from the memories I have of her,

00:19:47.585 --> 00:19:49.752
I knew that she wanted me.

00:19:50.842 --> 00:19:53.225
If nobody else wanted me, she did.

00:19:53.225 --> 00:19:55.975
(dramatic music)

00:19:59.561 --> 00:20:03.139
I remember my Chinese
mom, my birth mother.

00:20:03.139 --> 00:20:08.139
I remember she had long gray
hair and it was always braided.

00:20:09.556 --> 00:20:14.032
And my dad, he chopped
firewood for a living.

00:20:14.032 --> 00:20:15.265
And we lived in the countryside

00:20:15.265 --> 00:20:18.595
in a little shack with one bed.

00:20:18.595 --> 00:20:20.025
(somber music)

00:20:20.025 --> 00:20:22.697
I remember my mom piercing my ears.

00:20:22.697 --> 00:20:25.481
I think I was about one or two.

00:20:25.481 --> 00:20:28.572
And so I guess, other than myself,

00:20:28.572 --> 00:20:31.573
it's the only proof that she,

00:20:31.573 --> 00:20:35.906
my mom and my father ever
existed, my birth parents.

00:20:38.404 --> 00:20:42.571
In China back then, my dad
he really needed a son.

00:20:44.147 --> 00:20:47.888
And I was essentially a mistake to him.

00:20:47.888 --> 00:20:50.471
I wasn't supposed to be a girl.

00:20:52.969 --> 00:20:54.972
I remember my mom, she said to me,

00:20:54.972 --> 00:20:59.217
I'm going to visit your
grandparents, I'll be back soon.

00:20:59.217 --> 00:21:02.760
And she just handed me
over to my stepbrother.

00:21:02.760 --> 00:21:05.785
And my stepbrother, he
was about 20 at the time.

00:21:05.785 --> 00:21:10.240
And one day he took me
to the city on a bus.

00:21:10.240 --> 00:21:12.913
He sat me down on the sidewalk and said,

00:21:12.913 --> 00:21:16.048
"You sit here and wait
for me and I'll be back.

00:21:16.048 --> 00:21:17.553
I'm going to see a friend."

00:21:17.553 --> 00:21:20.237
And he just left like that.

00:21:20.237 --> 00:21:21.601
Never came back.

00:21:21.601 --> 00:21:24.540
(engine revving)

00:21:24.540 --> 00:21:27.790
That's how my life with a family ended,

00:21:30.296 --> 00:21:32.046
with my birth family.

00:21:32.957 --> 00:21:35.254
(person speaking foreign language)

00:21:35.254 --> 00:21:40.004
(indistinct chatter in foreign language)

00:21:41.317 --> 00:21:44.869
In our family, we have a
tradition of going back to China

00:21:44.869 --> 00:21:48.431
almost every year, we try for every year.

00:21:48.431 --> 00:21:49.765
I love China.

00:21:49.765 --> 00:21:51.515
China is my Homeland.

00:21:52.933 --> 00:21:56.016
And the summer of 2006, my mom and I,

00:21:58.463 --> 00:22:00.248
we traveled to China together.

00:22:00.248 --> 00:22:04.692
And we went to the countryside
to this foster village.

00:22:04.692 --> 00:22:06.781
One of the homes that we came to,

00:22:06.781 --> 00:22:09.623
I looked in the corner and I saw,

00:22:09.623 --> 00:22:12.852
and a little pink spec
caught my eye and I looked,

00:22:12.852 --> 00:22:15.788
I saw this beautiful little girl

00:22:15.788 --> 00:22:19.233
who was just sitting in
this sort of low stool.

00:22:19.233 --> 00:22:21.764
(soft music)

00:22:21.764 --> 00:22:25.953
She looked like a statue, but
there was life in her eyes.

00:22:25.953 --> 00:22:29.203
I could tell that she was really smart.

00:22:30.045 --> 00:22:34.434
The foster mom told us that
she had CP, cerebral palsy.

00:22:34.434 --> 00:22:36.944
And she said she was hopeless.

00:22:36.944 --> 00:22:40.561
And my mom said, "No, I
don't think she's hopeless."

00:22:40.561 --> 00:22:42.773
(soft music)

00:22:42.773 --> 00:22:44.248
I think in that moment,

00:22:44.248 --> 00:22:47.380
my mom realized this little
girl really needs help.

00:22:47.380 --> 00:22:49.241
And when we went back to the states,

00:22:49.241 --> 00:22:53.074
we raised close to $5,000
for the little girl.

00:22:54.289 --> 00:22:55.600
The little girl in pink,

00:22:55.600 --> 00:22:58.129
her Chinese name is Lu Run-Yi.

00:22:58.129 --> 00:23:01.806
And she's now in intensive
physical therapy.

00:23:01.806 --> 00:23:04.317
(Chinese traditional music)

00:23:04.317 --> 00:23:06.869
Just to see her adopted
would be delightful.

00:23:06.869 --> 00:23:09.069
It'd be wonderful.

00:23:09.069 --> 00:23:12.305
And if I go back to China next summer,

00:23:12.305 --> 00:23:16.138
I'm definitely stopping
in Hefei just for her.

00:23:21.213 --> 00:23:23.941
- Our mom usually tells
me to like calm down

00:23:23.941 --> 00:23:25.602
and not stress out so much.

00:23:25.602 --> 00:23:26.825
And she always tells Sara like,

00:23:26.825 --> 00:23:28.343
"Don't forget to do your work."

00:23:28.343 --> 00:23:30.423
Or like, "Don't forget
to practice your cello."

00:23:30.423 --> 00:23:31.430
(Jenna and Sara laugh)

00:23:31.430 --> 00:23:33.930
(cello music)

00:23:37.776 --> 00:23:42.602
We talk about being Asian
in this community, you know?

00:23:42.602 --> 00:23:44.964
- Yeah like we'll be
somewhere and we'll realize,

00:23:44.964 --> 00:23:47.064
oh, we're the only Asian people here.

00:23:47.064 --> 00:23:49.045
- Yeah and we all might
say that to each other.

00:23:49.045 --> 00:23:50.832
And then we'll, then we just laugh.

00:23:50.832 --> 00:23:54.265
- Jenna likes to say that
we're white on the inside

00:23:54.265 --> 00:23:56.522
and Chinese on the outside.

00:23:56.522 --> 00:23:59.472
But I don't know, I don't
really think that's true.

00:23:59.472 --> 00:24:01.722
I think it's kind of a mix.

00:24:04.166 --> 00:24:05.930
- Like a scrambled egg.

00:24:05.930 --> 00:24:07.261
- [Sara] I don't like eggs.

00:24:07.261 --> 00:24:08.881
(Jenna and Sara chuckles)

00:24:08.881 --> 00:24:10.629
- A lot of pictures for you.

00:24:10.629 --> 00:24:13.054
- Yeah, okay, thanks.

00:24:13.054 --> 00:24:14.350
My boyfriend's name's Andrew.

00:24:14.350 --> 00:24:16.942
And he's from South Korea.

00:24:16.942 --> 00:24:20.827
We met during my freshman
year and Andrew is a senior.

00:24:20.827 --> 00:24:22.494
Okay, bye, love you.

00:24:24.031 --> 00:24:25.679
- Love you too, bye.

00:24:25.679 --> 00:24:28.003
- I feel really comfortable
when I'm with him.

00:24:28.003 --> 00:24:30.611
And maybe that's why how there's like,

00:24:30.611 --> 00:24:33.718
I think a special understanding

00:24:33.718 --> 00:24:35.519
that underlies two individuals

00:24:35.519 --> 00:24:37.763
that are both in the minority,

00:24:37.763 --> 00:24:40.895
even though it's hard to put
words to that understanding.

00:24:40.895 --> 00:24:43.965
I think that it does exist.

00:24:43.965 --> 00:24:46.854
One time when I was staying
at his aunt's house,

00:24:46.854 --> 00:24:49.273
I saw his mom and she was
putting on all of her makeup

00:24:49.273 --> 00:24:51.542
for the day, like the different creams

00:24:51.542 --> 00:24:54.333
and like the different
eyeshadows and everything.

00:24:54.333 --> 00:24:58.741
And I remember just looking
at her external appearance

00:24:58.741 --> 00:25:01.781
and like just the fact that it was

00:25:01.781 --> 00:25:04.507
so similar to my external appearance.

00:25:04.507 --> 00:25:08.515
There's a nice like comfort
and sense of belonging in that.

00:25:08.515 --> 00:25:11.015
(piano music)

00:25:19.090 --> 00:25:20.595
- The fact that I was probably given up

00:25:20.595 --> 00:25:23.067
just 'cause I was a girl
doesn't really bother me.

00:25:23.067 --> 00:25:25.384
If I was back in China,
I'm not there right now.

00:25:25.384 --> 00:25:27.231
So I don't have to worry about that.

00:25:27.231 --> 00:25:28.347
(piano music)

00:25:28.347 --> 00:25:30.112
In America, it's more like I'm a girl,

00:25:30.112 --> 00:25:32.850
I can do what you can do and
I can do it in heels, so deal.

00:25:32.850 --> 00:25:35.477
(piano music)

00:25:35.477 --> 00:25:36.568
Just because I'm Asian,

00:25:36.568 --> 00:25:38.226
you're supposed to be good
at all these subjects.

00:25:38.226 --> 00:25:40.853
And no doubt you're in
advance classes, you're Asian,

00:25:40.853 --> 00:25:42.629
but I've had a few people
come up to me and say,

00:25:42.629 --> 00:25:43.462
"Do you speak English?"

00:25:43.462 --> 00:25:44.487
And whenever they do that, I say,

00:25:44.487 --> 00:25:48.306
"Well, I probably speak it
better than you thanks."

00:25:48.306 --> 00:25:50.848
- I was at camp once and
there's this little girl

00:25:50.848 --> 00:25:54.264
and she just walked up to me
and was like, "I know Chinese."

00:25:54.264 --> 00:25:56.079
And then she pulled her eyes
back and started gibbering.

00:25:56.079 --> 00:25:58.433
I was like, (laughs) okay.

00:25:58.433 --> 00:25:59.708
- [Interviewer] And what do you say

00:25:59.708 --> 00:26:01.093
when something like that happens?

00:26:01.093 --> 00:26:05.208
- Well, I just go like that
and say, "I know English."

00:26:05.208 --> 00:26:07.727
That's kind of mean, but you know.

00:26:07.727 --> 00:26:10.977
That is our wanna be band at band camp.

00:26:11.853 --> 00:26:13.512
I can't go to band camp this year

00:26:13.512 --> 00:26:16.571
because I will be in Europe
with the Global Girls.

00:26:16.571 --> 00:26:18.264
And there's gonna be five girls I think.

00:26:18.264 --> 00:26:22.508
We're going to England
and the Netherlands.

00:26:22.508 --> 00:26:24.517
- I'm going to the trip

00:26:24.517 --> 00:26:26.219
because I always wanted to go to England.

00:26:26.219 --> 00:26:29.376
I'm sure half of that has
to do with Harry Potter.

00:26:29.376 --> 00:26:31.471
I haven't really face to face met any

00:26:31.471 --> 00:26:33.116
of the other girls on the board.

00:26:33.116 --> 00:26:34.375
The one girl that I have talked

00:26:34.375 --> 00:26:37.087
to most in the group is Haley.

00:26:37.087 --> 00:26:39.139
- I've been almost everywhere in Asia,

00:26:39.139 --> 00:26:40.988
but I've never been to anywhere else.

00:26:40.988 --> 00:26:43.100
And Europe is like the
first place that I would go.

00:26:43.100 --> 00:26:44.791
And I'm like, yay.

00:26:44.791 --> 00:26:48.291
("Suddenly I See" begins)

00:26:58.579 --> 00:27:00.077
♪ Well her face is a map of the world ♪

00:27:00.077 --> 00:27:03.016
♪ Is a map of the world ♪

00:27:03.016 --> 00:27:04.754
♪ You can see she's a beautiful girl ♪

00:27:04.754 --> 00:27:07.824
♪ She's a beautiful girl ♪

00:27:07.824 --> 00:27:12.604
♪ And everything around her
is a silver pool of light ♪

00:27:12.604 --> 00:27:17.305
♪ The people who surround
her feel the benefit of it ♪

00:27:17.305 --> 00:27:19.498
♪ It makes you calm ♪

00:27:19.498 --> 00:27:24.071
♪ She holds you captivated in her palm ♪

00:27:24.071 --> 00:27:26.240
♪ Suddenly I see, suddenly I see ♪

00:27:26.240 --> 00:27:28.675
♪ This is what I wanna be ♪

00:27:28.675 --> 00:27:31.968
♪ Suddenly I see, suddenly I see ♪

00:27:31.968 --> 00:27:33.936
♪ Why the hell it means so much to me ♪

00:27:33.936 --> 00:27:34.769
- I'm taller.

00:27:34.769 --> 00:27:36.602
- You guys are rooting for her.

00:27:36.602 --> 00:27:37.856
I like the global girls

00:27:37.856 --> 00:27:40.557
because it connects everybody together.

00:27:40.557 --> 00:27:42.979
'Cause before this I had
my few Chinese friends

00:27:42.979 --> 00:27:44.336
that have been adopted

00:27:44.336 --> 00:27:46.928
and now I have like a
lot of Chinese friends

00:27:46.928 --> 00:27:49.257
that have been adopted
and they know what's like,

00:27:49.257 --> 00:27:50.902
when people say stupid
stuff, they're like, oh yeah,

00:27:50.902 --> 00:27:52.285
I know what that's like.

00:27:52.285 --> 00:27:53.459
So how does that make you feel like

00:27:53.459 --> 00:27:54.429
when you're out with your parents

00:27:54.429 --> 00:27:56.140
and people are like staring at you?

00:27:56.140 --> 00:27:58.798
- I'm not really bothered.

00:27:58.798 --> 00:28:01.056
(all girls laughing)

00:28:01.056 --> 00:28:01.889
I don't really care,

00:28:01.889 --> 00:28:03.958
but I don't really care
what other people think.

00:28:03.958 --> 00:28:05.122
- I do-
- It's uncomfortable.

00:28:05.122 --> 00:28:06.108
- I'm a big, huh?

00:28:06.108 --> 00:28:07.543
- It's uncomfortable for you.

00:28:07.543 --> 00:28:08.423
- Yeah, it is uncomfortable but-

00:28:08.423 --> 00:28:10.486
- But I get so, no offense to my parents

00:28:10.486 --> 00:28:12.638
'cause I love them but
I get so embarrassed.

00:28:12.638 --> 00:28:15.028
'Cause most of my friends,
they look like their parents.

00:28:15.028 --> 00:28:15.861
- Yeah.

00:28:15.861 --> 00:28:19.528
- So, but anyway, it's
good to be different.

00:28:20.730 --> 00:28:22.081
- [Haley] Have you ever
considered going back

00:28:22.081 --> 00:28:23.626
to your orphanage in like trying

00:28:23.626 --> 00:28:25.333
to find any birth parents or relatives?

00:28:25.333 --> 00:28:26.783
- Yes.
- Yes.

00:28:26.783 --> 00:28:28.331
- But I don't think
that's possible really.

00:28:28.331 --> 00:28:29.427
(girls laughing)

00:28:29.427 --> 00:28:31.823
My friends have said to me,
"Could you not track them down?"

00:28:31.823 --> 00:28:33.765
And I said, "Well, I don't think so

00:28:33.765 --> 00:28:35.423
because China's so far away.

00:28:35.423 --> 00:28:36.840
It's like the other side of the world."

00:28:36.840 --> 00:28:38.123
- And there's millions of Chinese people.

00:28:38.123 --> 00:28:38.956
- There's so many,

00:28:38.956 --> 00:28:41.816
China's such a massive
country and you know...

00:28:41.816 --> 00:28:43.618
- [Haley] Do you guys
like know your background

00:28:43.618 --> 00:28:46.133
or do you ever wonder about those-

00:28:46.133 --> 00:28:46.966
- [Girl] The small details.

00:28:46.966 --> 00:28:47.839
- [Haley] Yeah, the small details

00:28:47.839 --> 00:28:49.593
that they'll know what they do.

00:28:49.593 --> 00:28:52.774
- Well, I only know where I was dumped.

00:28:52.774 --> 00:28:54.767
- Yeah-
- Outside the hospital.

00:28:54.767 --> 00:28:56.396
- I was outside an orphanage.

00:28:56.396 --> 00:28:58.054
- I was under a willow tree.

00:28:58.054 --> 00:28:59.961
- But I dunno,

00:28:59.961 --> 00:29:02.864
I dunno anything about how old I was

00:29:02.864 --> 00:29:04.416
like how many days old I was

00:29:04.416 --> 00:29:06.634
when I was, you know,
dumped on the street.

00:29:06.634 --> 00:29:10.003
But no, I don't know
anything apart from that.

00:29:10.003 --> 00:29:11.239
- They don't give you any information.

00:29:11.239 --> 00:29:14.119
- Yeah, and even my note, I
think, my mom only told me

00:29:14.119 --> 00:29:17.373
that it just said my
name and when I was born.

00:29:17.373 --> 00:29:18.206
- Yeah.

00:29:18.206 --> 00:29:19.840
- But it didn't give me any names

00:29:19.840 --> 00:29:23.590
as to who my family
members were or anything.

00:29:25.108 --> 00:29:26.068
Stop staring at me.

00:29:26.068 --> 00:29:28.288
(all girls laughing)

00:29:28.288 --> 00:29:31.788
("Suddenly I See" begins)

00:29:43.044 --> 00:29:47.481
- Today, we are meeting
with Hilbrand Westra

00:29:47.481 --> 00:29:49.607
who is the president and founder

00:29:49.607 --> 00:29:52.042
of Adoptees United the Netherlands.

00:29:52.042 --> 00:29:57.042
And he is really inspirational
and also highly controversial

00:29:58.487 --> 00:30:00.176
in the adoption communities.

00:30:00.176 --> 00:30:02.359
He feels that international adoption

00:30:02.359 --> 00:30:04.442
should not exist, at all.

00:30:07.485 --> 00:30:10.461
- Our main point at this
moment is to see whether or not

00:30:10.461 --> 00:30:12.647
international adoption
should be continued.

00:30:12.647 --> 00:30:14.157
One of our issues right now is

00:30:14.157 --> 00:30:17.264
to try to have an international research

00:30:17.264 --> 00:30:19.891
about Chinese adoption.

00:30:19.891 --> 00:30:21.499
Many people in the Netherlands said,

00:30:21.499 --> 00:30:22.903
"Nothing is wrong with China.

00:30:22.903 --> 00:30:24.893
Everything is covered by the CCAA."

00:30:24.893 --> 00:30:27.486
The central authority body in China.

00:30:27.486 --> 00:30:30.525
And because of that, we assume
that everything is covered

00:30:30.525 --> 00:30:33.322
in a legal way in the process.

00:30:33.322 --> 00:30:35.853
But we could prove that a
lot of things went wrong

00:30:35.853 --> 00:30:39.936
before the children's went
to the files for CCAA.

00:30:41.195 --> 00:30:45.226
So we want to have the possibility
to see the original file,

00:30:45.226 --> 00:30:48.540
adoptees can have a copy
of all the original papers.

00:30:48.540 --> 00:30:50.438
- Why do you think they
don't want the adoptees

00:30:50.438 --> 00:30:51.399
to see their files?

00:30:51.399 --> 00:30:54.108
- [Hilbrand] Why do you think yourself?

00:30:54.108 --> 00:30:57.063
- Because they're afraid
they'll find their parents.

00:30:57.063 --> 00:30:59.627
- What we know now by the
Korean history, in this case,

00:30:59.627 --> 00:31:02.592
we know that a lot of files
were falsified, fraud,

00:31:02.592 --> 00:31:06.663
papers were misinterpreted
and mistranslated, et cetera.

00:31:06.663 --> 00:31:11.430
And many times we even have
seen that many files were hidden

00:31:11.430 --> 00:31:15.596
because what we know now about
a lot of Korean adoptees,

00:31:15.596 --> 00:31:17.974
they were not orphans.

00:31:17.974 --> 00:31:20.387
And many Korean adoptees who went abroad

00:31:20.387 --> 00:31:23.461
were always told they don't
have a father or a mother.

00:31:23.461 --> 00:31:25.944
Most times they don't
have even both of them.

00:31:25.944 --> 00:31:29.164
So there is a reason to let
these children to be adopted.

00:31:29.164 --> 00:31:31.439
But what we know now,
that is most of the times,

00:31:31.439 --> 00:31:33.087
it was not true.

00:31:33.087 --> 00:31:35.494
They find out that it
was much more information

00:31:35.494 --> 00:31:36.384
than they ever knew.

00:31:36.384 --> 00:31:39.987
Because of that, the possibility
to find the original family

00:31:39.987 --> 00:31:41.237
is much bigger.

00:31:42.678 --> 00:31:45.091
- I was adopted when I was six months old

00:31:45.091 --> 00:31:48.051
but I went back to my
orphanage when I was younger.

00:31:48.051 --> 00:31:52.687
And they have a note that
my birth mother left on me

00:31:52.687 --> 00:31:54.735
and it had my birthday on it.

00:31:54.735 --> 00:31:57.568
And so I know when my birthday is,

00:31:58.543 --> 00:32:01.134
and that's about the only thing I know.

00:32:01.134 --> 00:32:04.470
I would like to know if I
have any brothers or sisters.

00:32:04.470 --> 00:32:06.703
(somber music)

00:32:06.703 --> 00:32:08.351
I wanna try and find them if I can.

00:32:08.351 --> 00:32:10.745
- It's quite important
to do it as long you can,

00:32:10.745 --> 00:32:12.335
because we find out that many adoptees,

00:32:12.335 --> 00:32:14.589
they do this too late.

00:32:14.589 --> 00:32:16.945
And middle organizations
in the country for origin,

00:32:16.945 --> 00:32:18.370
most of times when you come back they say,

00:32:18.370 --> 00:32:19.519
"Yeah, we had to huge fire."

00:32:19.519 --> 00:32:23.191
Or, "There was an
accident," or whatsoever.

00:32:23.191 --> 00:32:24.891
(somber music)

00:32:24.891 --> 00:32:27.181
So the lessons learned from our history,

00:32:27.181 --> 00:32:30.848
I would advise to do
it as soon as possible.

00:32:32.210 --> 00:32:34.837
- I think about like
finding my birth mother,

00:32:34.837 --> 00:32:38.160
but I wouldn't want to make either

00:32:38.160 --> 00:32:40.243
of my moms feel unwanted.

00:32:42.325 --> 00:32:43.340
- So what we always say,

00:32:43.340 --> 00:32:46.466
adoption is something you take
with you for your whole life.

00:32:46.466 --> 00:32:50.111
You can try to run for it,
but it runs faster than you.

00:32:50.111 --> 00:32:52.694
(somber music)

00:32:57.215 --> 00:32:59.798
(upbeat music)

00:33:46.220 --> 00:33:47.133
- When I come here, you know,

00:33:47.133 --> 00:33:49.841
people assume that I'm Chinese,
but I dress differently.

00:33:49.841 --> 00:33:52.857
And when I open my mouth,
they know that I'm either

00:33:52.857 --> 00:33:54.514
from Beijing or somewhere else

00:33:54.514 --> 00:33:57.970
'cause I speak very
proper standard Chinese.

00:33:57.970 --> 00:34:02.053
(indistinct marketplace chatter)

00:34:03.068 --> 00:34:05.001
Whether I'm in America or in China,

00:34:05.001 --> 00:34:07.868
they know that in some
way I'm a foreigner.

00:34:07.868 --> 00:34:12.868
(market sellers speaking foreign language)

00:34:13.042 --> 00:34:17.042
I guess I'm a child stuck
between two countries.

00:34:18.154 --> 00:34:20.057
(indistinct marketplace chatter)

00:34:20.057 --> 00:34:23.194
And, I don't know what that makes me.

00:34:23.194 --> 00:34:26.029
I don't think it makes
me Chinese-American.

00:34:26.029 --> 00:34:28.152
It doesn't, definitely
doesn't make me American.

00:34:28.152 --> 00:34:31.319
It doesn't make me absolutely Chinese.

00:34:32.208 --> 00:34:37.208
So I don't, I guess I'm kinda
confused about my identity.

00:34:37.597 --> 00:34:40.347
(engine revving)

00:34:42.567 --> 00:34:44.428
I'm looking for a Dai outfit

00:34:44.428 --> 00:34:46.658
or any sort of minority clothing

00:34:46.658 --> 00:34:48.832
because whenever I go to these places,

00:34:48.832 --> 00:34:51.328
I don't wanna stand out
because if I stand out,

00:34:51.328 --> 00:34:53.222
it's harder for me to talk to people

00:34:53.222 --> 00:34:55.936
and really be a part of the community.

00:34:55.936 --> 00:34:58.851
And they think I'm a local.

00:34:58.851 --> 00:35:01.578
Since I've come to China every
summer I've always asked,

00:35:01.578 --> 00:35:03.219
"What minority group do I look like?"

00:35:03.219 --> 00:35:04.864
And people think I'm Miao

00:35:04.864 --> 00:35:09.267
but other people have said Yi
or Dai or some other group.

00:35:09.267 --> 00:35:10.361
Each time I go back,

00:35:10.361 --> 00:35:13.912
I'd like to figure out what I really am.

00:35:13.912 --> 00:35:16.217
(upbeat background music)

00:35:16.217 --> 00:35:17.379
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:35:17.379 --> 00:35:18.212
(upbeat background music)

00:35:18.212 --> 00:35:22.129
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:35:24.141 --> 00:35:28.308
(sellers speaks foreign language)

00:35:33.617 --> 00:35:36.804
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:35:36.804 --> 00:35:41.138
(sellers speaks foreign language)

00:35:41.138 --> 00:35:44.390
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:35:44.390 --> 00:35:46.933
Every time I come here,
I get a different answer.

00:35:46.933 --> 00:35:49.587
Sometimes I wish I would
just get the same answer.

00:35:49.587 --> 00:35:52.790
But this shopkeeper said I looked Dai.

00:35:52.790 --> 00:35:54.040
So now I'm Dai.

00:35:56.032 --> 00:35:58.513
Other than then getting dressed up,

00:35:58.513 --> 00:36:02.630
I go to villages like Dai
villages or Miao villages,

00:36:02.630 --> 00:36:04.886
minority villages where
I might find people

00:36:04.886 --> 00:36:06.673
that look like me.

00:36:06.673 --> 00:36:10.506
(chatter in foreign language)

00:36:36.086 --> 00:36:37.709
- When you come into the world

00:36:37.709 --> 00:36:40.723
and you know that your parents,

00:36:40.723 --> 00:36:43.158
or at least your dad thinks lesser of you

00:36:43.158 --> 00:36:47.552
because of your gender,
something that you can't control,

00:36:47.552 --> 00:36:50.357
it's wrong and you wanna
prove you, you know,

00:36:50.357 --> 00:36:52.819
I want to prove him wrong.

00:36:52.819 --> 00:36:55.637
(Chinese traditional music)

00:36:55.637 --> 00:36:59.137
We deserve fair treatment, and especially,

00:37:01.962 --> 00:37:03.584
especially in China.

00:37:03.584 --> 00:37:07.025
I know I can't change a whole country,

00:37:07.025 --> 00:37:08.346
but I'd like to.

00:37:08.346 --> 00:37:12.013
(Chinese traditional music)

00:37:22.230 --> 00:37:23.368
(indistinct chatter)

00:37:23.368 --> 00:37:27.872
So we are at the Anhui
Hefei orphanage right now.

00:37:27.872 --> 00:37:32.455
We're going to meet Lu Run-Yi,
the little girl in pink.

00:37:39.162 --> 00:37:42.995
(chatter in foreign language)

00:38:00.511 --> 00:38:04.200
I see a little bit of myself in her

00:38:04.200 --> 00:38:07.727
because she's older and
you know, she's so strong,

00:38:07.727 --> 00:38:12.277
but she's probably had
it tougher than I had it

00:38:12.277 --> 00:38:13.645
because of her disability

00:38:13.645 --> 00:38:17.425
but I think that's what
makes her stronger.

00:38:17.425 --> 00:38:22.425
(physical therapist speaks
in foreign language)

00:38:29.543 --> 00:38:30.508
(Run-Yi speaks foreign language)

00:38:30.508 --> 00:38:32.428
(physical therapist speaks
in foreign language)

00:38:32.428 --> 00:38:35.095
(hopeful music)

00:38:38.284 --> 00:38:40.147
She hasn't been matched with a family,

00:38:40.147 --> 00:38:44.585
but my mom knows a couple who
adopted a daughter with CP

00:38:44.585 --> 00:38:47.971
and they want, they would
like another one with CP.

00:38:47.971 --> 00:38:50.345
So, and they're very interested in her.

00:38:50.345 --> 00:38:52.182
(hopeful music)

00:38:52.182 --> 00:38:55.971
I might be traveling with
them if they adopt her.

00:38:55.971 --> 00:38:57.750
I would be their translator.

00:38:57.750 --> 00:39:00.115
Because when you adopt an older child,

00:39:00.115 --> 00:39:02.513
a lot of these facilitators
that go with families

00:39:02.513 --> 00:39:05.081
don't know what to say to
the child to, you know,

00:39:05.081 --> 00:39:06.892
help them warm up to the family

00:39:06.892 --> 00:39:09.292
or how to feel okay about, you know,

00:39:09.292 --> 00:39:11.558
going to a whole another world.

00:39:11.558 --> 00:39:13.526
(hopeful music)

00:39:13.526 --> 00:39:15.792
I hope that Run-Yi will be able

00:39:15.792 --> 00:39:18.121
to have what I have
now, you know, a family

00:39:18.121 --> 00:39:20.663
that will love her for
the rest of her life

00:39:20.663 --> 00:39:23.919
and for her to have a place
where she can call home

00:39:23.919 --> 00:39:27.555
and always just know that she's loved.

00:39:27.555 --> 00:39:29.881
(hopeful music)

00:39:29.881 --> 00:39:31.683
(child laughing)

00:39:31.683 --> 00:39:36.120
(Haley's mom and sister laughing)

00:39:36.120 --> 00:39:37.033
- Since I went to Europe,

00:39:37.033 --> 00:39:39.494
it made me wanna find my
birth parents even more

00:39:39.494 --> 00:39:41.763
'cause I realized I hadn't
been looking for them.

00:39:41.763 --> 00:39:44.666
And it made me wanna go back to my village

00:39:44.666 --> 00:39:46.396
where I would've lived and see

00:39:46.396 --> 00:39:50.105
if I could like find
my sister or something.

00:39:50.105 --> 00:39:51.267
- She would always say,

00:39:51.267 --> 00:39:54.505
"I wish I had blonde hair
and blue eyes like my Heidi,"

00:39:54.505 --> 00:39:56.006
her big sister.

00:39:56.006 --> 00:39:58.812
So she knew she was
different at that time.

00:39:58.812 --> 00:39:59.980
And so she was quite young.

00:39:59.980 --> 00:40:03.017
I'd say four-ish when she
really started talking about

00:40:03.017 --> 00:40:07.119
where she was from and wanting
to get more information.

00:40:07.119 --> 00:40:09.315
I just always told her there was no way

00:40:09.315 --> 00:40:11.561
that we would ever know anything.

00:40:11.561 --> 00:40:13.768
And that may be how it turns out.

00:40:13.768 --> 00:40:15.641
We may never know anything.

00:40:15.641 --> 00:40:17.970
Haley, you wanna see these papers?

00:40:17.970 --> 00:40:20.370
(envelope rustling)

00:40:20.370 --> 00:40:21.570
This is what's gonna,

00:40:21.570 --> 00:40:24.568
help us get started in
finding your birth parents.

00:40:24.568 --> 00:40:26.190
And the first thing we're going to do

00:40:26.190 --> 00:40:29.794
is get a copy of your file
is if they still have it.

00:40:29.794 --> 00:40:30.627
- Yeah.

00:40:30.627 --> 00:40:33.560
- And then we will go
back to your finding spot

00:40:33.560 --> 00:40:35.893
and just ask some questions.

00:40:38.146 --> 00:40:40.447
- So in July, me and a group of girls

00:40:40.447 --> 00:40:41.998
that were adopted from China with me

00:40:41.998 --> 00:40:44.097
are going back to our provinces

00:40:44.097 --> 00:40:46.338
and then we're gonna go to our villages

00:40:46.338 --> 00:40:49.921
and put up our posters
that we've all made.

00:40:52.940 --> 00:40:56.722
I don't really have any
expectations, but you know,

00:40:56.722 --> 00:41:00.152
it's always nice to see if
there's anybody out there like

00:41:00.152 --> 00:41:02.168
who knows, maybe somebody
could find the card

00:41:02.168 --> 00:41:04.760
and then it'll go all the way
to like Shanghai or something.

00:41:04.760 --> 00:41:07.582
And then somebody be there
like, "Oh, hey, that's my kid,"

00:41:07.582 --> 00:41:09.165
but you never know.

00:41:10.306 --> 00:41:13.389
(indistinct chatter)

00:41:19.912 --> 00:41:23.745
(chatter in foreign language)

00:41:48.510 --> 00:41:49.832
- [Haley's Mom] What, what?

00:41:49.832 --> 00:41:51.019
What's happening?

00:41:51.019 --> 00:41:53.680
(chatter in foreign language)

00:41:53.680 --> 00:41:57.763
- She looks like the
daughters of her her cousin,

00:41:59.064 --> 00:42:01.851
maybe she was abandoned.

00:42:01.851 --> 00:42:04.603
- Oh.
(chatter in foreign language)

00:42:04.603 --> 00:42:06.686
- [Haley's Mom] Oh my, oh my.

00:42:06.686 --> 00:42:09.269
(somber music)

00:42:16.266 --> 00:42:18.272
- I'm about to meet someone, not about to-

00:42:18.272 --> 00:42:19.216
- Her father.

00:42:19.216 --> 00:42:22.036
- Yeah, maybe this guy might be my dad.

00:42:22.036 --> 00:42:23.549
And he is bringing his other daughter

00:42:23.549 --> 00:42:25.348
who is my big, big sister.

00:42:25.348 --> 00:42:26.717
- He has four daughters.

00:42:26.717 --> 00:42:29.511
- To compare and see if I look like her.

00:42:29.511 --> 00:42:32.093
And if I do, then we're
gonna do DNA testing

00:42:32.093 --> 00:42:33.910
and see if he is me padre.

00:42:33.910 --> 00:42:34.868
- Yes.

00:42:34.868 --> 00:42:36.516
- This is really scary.

00:42:36.516 --> 00:42:39.099
(somber music)

00:42:43.883 --> 00:42:47.208
So this is the guy that I think is my dad.

00:42:47.208 --> 00:42:52.041
And that's my sister, I think
over there, maybe who knows.

00:42:53.063 --> 00:42:55.908
She's the second to last standers.

00:42:55.908 --> 00:42:57.840
(indistinct chatter)

00:42:57.840 --> 00:42:59.460
Say hi.

00:42:59.460 --> 00:43:01.190
(indistinct chatter)

00:43:01.190 --> 00:43:03.135
(Haley's father speaks
in foreign language)

00:43:03.135 --> 00:43:04.471
- [Translator] You are the first one.

00:43:04.471 --> 00:43:07.344
(Haley's father speaks
in foreign language)

00:43:07.344 --> 00:43:10.628
He come back home to, grow field.

00:43:10.628 --> 00:43:13.981
(Haley's father speaks
in foreign language)

00:43:13.981 --> 00:43:17.650
Go back to grow field and
your mom throw you away.

00:43:17.650 --> 00:43:20.085
- Can you ask him where my mom is?

00:43:20.085 --> 00:43:23.916
(translator speaks in foreign language)

00:43:23.916 --> 00:43:25.483
(Haley's father speaks
in foreign language)

00:43:25.483 --> 00:43:26.977
- [Translator] At home, not here.

00:43:26.977 --> 00:43:31.977
(Haley's father speaks
in foreign language)

00:43:33.535 --> 00:43:36.118
(somber music)

00:43:46.669 --> 00:43:49.487
- It's been quite
interesting to say the least.

00:43:49.487 --> 00:43:52.475
What's really weird is
all these people are here

00:43:52.475 --> 00:43:54.864
to see me like my aunts and uncles

00:43:54.864 --> 00:43:59.459
and cousins and stuff and
yet my mom won't come.

00:43:59.459 --> 00:44:00.841
I mean, they, we asked her,

00:44:00.841 --> 00:44:03.385
we asked them why like
a ton of times, like,

00:44:03.385 --> 00:44:04.333
why isn't she here?

00:44:04.333 --> 00:44:06.688
Like she could take a day off and like,

00:44:06.688 --> 00:44:10.240
oh, we have a shop at
our home and our home.

00:44:10.240 --> 00:44:12.797
And she has to work
there and do that stuff.

00:44:12.797 --> 00:44:15.088
And so we thought that was kind of weird,

00:44:15.088 --> 00:44:16.886
but you know, whatever.

00:44:16.886 --> 00:44:18.614
(indistinct chatter)

00:44:18.614 --> 00:44:23.296
If the DNA is positive,
I don't know what's next.

00:44:23.296 --> 00:44:25.443
(indistinct chatter)

00:44:25.443 --> 00:44:29.088
We're just gonna play it by
ear and see what happens.

00:44:29.088 --> 00:44:31.671
(somber music)

00:44:39.926 --> 00:44:42.509
(upbeat music)

00:45:03.494 --> 00:45:06.710
- We're up in the Finger
Lakes of New York.

00:45:06.710 --> 00:45:10.131
We have a little vacation
house up here and yeah,

00:45:10.131 --> 00:45:12.964
we just come up during the summer.

00:45:14.176 --> 00:45:17.364
I always wanted to go to
China when I was younger.

00:45:17.364 --> 00:45:20.821
My dad told me we would when I was older.

00:45:20.821 --> 00:45:23.667
I probably wanna go to China more now

00:45:23.667 --> 00:45:25.107
because I've met these people,

00:45:25.107 --> 00:45:26.608
especially like people like Haley,

00:45:26.608 --> 00:45:28.790
who's gone like as many
times as she's gone,

00:45:28.790 --> 00:45:31.395
that she's that many years old.

00:45:31.395 --> 00:45:33.184
And Haley and I have gotten pretty close

00:45:33.184 --> 00:45:34.317
since we met each other.

00:45:34.317 --> 00:45:37.344
She was really like,
very obvious about her

00:45:37.344 --> 00:45:39.757
like want to find her birth family.

00:45:39.757 --> 00:45:40.590
And she said,

00:45:40.590 --> 00:45:42.501
"I will be looking for my birth parents

00:45:42.501 --> 00:45:44.627
until I'm gray and wrinkly."

00:45:44.627 --> 00:45:47.437
And it just kinda surprised me that like,

00:45:47.437 --> 00:45:49.091
(water lapping)

00:45:49.091 --> 00:45:50.953
it can affect someone that much I guess.

00:45:50.953 --> 00:45:52.646
(water lapping)

00:45:52.646 --> 00:45:55.635
Some of the bigger things
like meeting my birth parents

00:45:55.635 --> 00:45:58.249
and going to China have
changed a little bit.

00:45:58.249 --> 00:46:00.387
(water lapping)

00:46:00.387 --> 00:46:01.597
I mean, it'd be nice to know

00:46:01.597 --> 00:46:03.075
what my birth parents look like.

00:46:03.075 --> 00:46:05.427
Just, you know, say, oh,
I got this from my mom.

00:46:05.427 --> 00:46:07.491
I got that from my dad and so on.

00:46:07.491 --> 00:46:09.824
But it's not this huge like,

00:46:10.838 --> 00:46:14.163
quest in my life to find them I guess.

00:46:14.163 --> 00:46:17.281
I'm pretty, I'm happy with my parents now.

00:46:17.281 --> 00:46:18.652
(water lapping)

00:46:18.652 --> 00:46:21.235
(upbeat music)

00:46:47.907 --> 00:46:51.990
(parent speaks foreign language)

00:46:57.030 --> 00:47:00.259
- Well, I always knew I was
adopted when my parents told me,

00:47:00.259 --> 00:47:02.131
just like how people tell the story

00:47:02.131 --> 00:47:03.990
of their stomach growing
larger and larger,

00:47:03.990 --> 00:47:06.471
my parents would tell the
story of how they flew

00:47:06.471 --> 00:47:08.501
to the other side of the world to get me.

00:47:08.501 --> 00:47:11.417
But I feel like my understanding
of my being adopted

00:47:11.417 --> 00:47:12.750
is always evolving.

00:47:12.750 --> 00:47:16.051
(piano music)

00:47:16.051 --> 00:47:18.304
I carry my experiences to share

00:47:18.304 --> 00:47:21.305
like origami paper in my pockets.

00:47:21.305 --> 00:47:24.991
Traveling to talks, I know how
to pick out the right pieces,

00:47:24.991 --> 00:47:29.897
blue for racism, red for
culture, green for identity.

00:47:29.897 --> 00:47:33.440
I can fold the color squares
using just the right words

00:47:33.440 --> 00:47:36.320
and give the parents a crane, an orchard,

00:47:36.320 --> 00:47:39.715
some shapely advice out
of my sheets of memories.

00:47:39.715 --> 00:47:44.715
- My question is that how do
you cope with the word abandon?

00:47:46.483 --> 00:47:48.977
- It's really, it's a negative word to me.

00:47:48.977 --> 00:47:52.099
It makes me sad to feel that,
you know, you say your mother

00:47:52.099 --> 00:47:53.520
or your parents abandoned you,

00:47:53.520 --> 00:47:57.216
that it doesn't sound very
happy, but if it comes up,

00:47:57.216 --> 00:48:01.824
maybe when I'm explaining how
I was adopted to my friends,

00:48:01.824 --> 00:48:03.289
then I correct them.

00:48:03.289 --> 00:48:05.795
I say I wasn't abandoned that I was,

00:48:05.795 --> 00:48:09.545
I was placed or I was
put into a better life.

00:48:10.425 --> 00:48:13.631
- I think that even though
like 99% of me believes

00:48:13.631 --> 00:48:15.360
that I was really placed,

00:48:15.360 --> 00:48:18.550
I think somehow I can't
get rid of that 1%.

00:48:18.550 --> 00:48:21.024
And I think there's
definitely a part of me

00:48:21.024 --> 00:48:23.328
that wishes I'd never
heard the word abandonment.

00:48:23.328 --> 00:48:26.167
I think one of the strongest
ways that the word abandonment

00:48:26.167 --> 00:48:29.350
has affected my life is that,

00:48:29.350 --> 00:48:33.631
is just my perfectionist
tendencies and my failure,

00:48:33.631 --> 00:48:36.336
and my fear of failure.

00:48:36.336 --> 00:48:38.521
I think at this point in
my high school career,

00:48:38.521 --> 00:48:40.512
it's what I struggle with most.

00:48:40.512 --> 00:48:44.595
(parent speaks foreign language)

00:48:49.862 --> 00:48:54.862
- [Translator] I'm sorry,
I'm sorry, I made you cry.

00:48:55.026 --> 00:48:56.690
(Jenna sobs)

00:48:56.690 --> 00:48:59.426
- I think like, (sobs)

00:48:59.426 --> 00:49:03.912
I'm always searching
for a way to compensate

00:49:03.912 --> 00:49:07.059
for the fact that I'm a girl

00:49:07.059 --> 00:49:11.603
and that I was probably poor, (sobs)

00:49:11.603 --> 00:49:16.436
and that like for some reason,
maybe I wasn't good enough.

00:49:18.435 --> 00:49:20.521
And I think like, (sobs)

00:49:20.521 --> 00:49:23.193
in my learning, I always
tried to be like the best

00:49:23.193 --> 00:49:25.714
that I can to compensate for that

00:49:25.714 --> 00:49:28.964
like that initial like abandonment

00:49:28.964 --> 00:49:31.940
or like initial rejection. (sobs)

00:49:31.940 --> 00:49:34.177
Even if I was really placed,

00:49:34.177 --> 00:49:36.346
like I can't get rid of that

00:49:36.346 --> 00:49:39.992
like small thought that
maybe I was abandoned.

00:49:39.992 --> 00:49:42.106
Thank you.
- Thank you very much.

00:49:42.106 --> 00:49:45.189
(indistinct chatter)

00:49:49.715 --> 00:49:52.701
- After the formal talk, a
español lady approaches me

00:49:52.701 --> 00:49:56.577
from the audience, (speaks
foreign language) she says.

00:49:56.577 --> 00:49:58.708
(lady speaks foreign language)

00:49:58.708 --> 00:50:02.541
(chatter in foreign language)

00:50:09.075 --> 00:50:12.236
- She knew this was going to
be very important for her.

00:50:12.236 --> 00:50:14.156
And now she knows why it's important

00:50:14.156 --> 00:50:15.404
for her to give it to you.

00:50:15.404 --> 00:50:17.119
She has two others which she's keeping

00:50:17.119 --> 00:50:19.558
for herself and for her daughter.

00:50:19.558 --> 00:50:22.498
But this was to do with
her process of adoption.

00:50:22.498 --> 00:50:24.275
But she wants you to have it.

00:50:24.275 --> 00:50:25.715
- Oh, thank you so much.

00:50:25.715 --> 00:50:30.035
(lady speaks foreign language)

00:50:30.035 --> 00:50:32.195
Tell her it is such an
honor for me to meet her.

00:50:32.195 --> 00:50:33.690
(translator speaks foreign language)

00:50:33.690 --> 00:50:35.376
(Jenna chuckles)

00:50:35.376 --> 00:50:37.178
(indistinct chatter)

00:50:37.178 --> 00:50:38.416
(piano music)

00:50:38.416 --> 00:50:40.933
She unties the jade pendant
from around her neck

00:50:40.933 --> 00:50:42.688
and then reties it around mine.

00:50:42.688 --> 00:50:43.754
(piano music)

00:50:43.754 --> 00:50:46.768
The delicate carvings and
milky hues of the jade

00:50:46.768 --> 00:50:49.622
feel smooth and comforting and mysterious.

00:50:49.622 --> 00:50:53.149
She says, "When you go to
China to work in the orphanage,

00:50:53.149 --> 00:50:55.286
perhaps you'll take care of my daughter."

00:50:55.286 --> 00:50:57.245
(piano music)

00:50:57.245 --> 00:51:01.565
Of all the baby orphans in
China and all 34 provinces,

00:51:01.565 --> 00:51:04.493
I plan to go to only one orphanage.

00:51:04.493 --> 00:51:07.154
The chances of me working
with Yolanda's baby

00:51:07.154 --> 00:51:09.446
to be are near impossible,

00:51:09.446 --> 00:51:13.622
but I know I will see Yolanda's
baby in every orphan's face.

00:51:13.622 --> 00:51:15.459
(piano music)

00:51:15.459 --> 00:51:17.547
I carry Yolanda in the jade.

00:51:17.547 --> 00:51:20.019
I carry pride in my Chinese culture.

00:51:20.019 --> 00:51:22.397
I carry an adoptive mother's love.

00:51:22.397 --> 00:51:24.316
I carry a new sense of purpose.

00:51:24.316 --> 00:51:26.256
(piano music)

00:51:26.256 --> 00:51:28.118
The necklace makes me want pray

00:51:28.118 --> 00:51:30.819
more than a church or monk or mosque

00:51:30.819 --> 00:51:33.686
because it found its way
to me by some act of faith.

00:51:33.686 --> 00:51:34.720
(piano music)

00:51:34.720 --> 00:51:35.859
Because of these conferences,

00:51:35.859 --> 00:51:40.480
I speak of my adoption story
as if I've stopped living it.

00:51:40.480 --> 00:51:41.897
And the truth is,

00:51:42.915 --> 00:51:46.849
I don't know where my life will take me.

00:51:46.849 --> 00:51:50.448
Because in that necklace,
I carry both my mothers.

00:51:50.448 --> 00:51:52.829
Because someday maybe I hope I will fall

00:51:52.829 --> 00:51:55.853
into my Chinese mother's arms,

00:51:55.853 --> 00:51:59.741
just as that necklace
fell into mine. (sobs)

00:51:59.741 --> 00:52:02.429
I look into the eyes
of the jade salamander

00:52:02.429 --> 00:52:05.299
perching on the pair,
and I think of Yolanda

00:52:05.299 --> 00:52:07.267
and all of the mothers like her

00:52:07.267 --> 00:52:10.350
who are waiting for children like me.

00:52:14.105 --> 00:52:16.605
(car honking)

00:52:20.627 --> 00:52:24.544
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:52:27.037 --> 00:52:29.594
- We found out a family was interested

00:52:29.594 --> 00:52:32.138
in adopting the little girl in pink.

00:52:32.138 --> 00:52:34.717
The mom Sheryl really wants me to be there

00:52:34.717 --> 00:52:37.069
because of my connection.

00:52:37.069 --> 00:52:40.848
And because of the deep roots
I really have with Run-Yi.

00:52:40.848 --> 00:52:43.598
(car door opens)

00:52:47.339 --> 00:52:51.172
(chatter in foreign language)

00:53:23.042 --> 00:53:25.431
I want this experience
for this little girl

00:53:25.431 --> 00:53:28.718
to be every bit as
special as it was for me.

00:53:28.718 --> 00:53:31.385
(hopeful music)

00:53:32.391 --> 00:53:33.308
Sheryl, hi.

00:53:37.047 --> 00:53:38.724
- I can help you with these heavy things.

00:53:38.724 --> 00:53:40.526
- Okay. (chuckles)

00:53:40.526 --> 00:53:42.308
- I'm so happy to see you.

00:53:42.308 --> 00:53:43.764
I'm sorry you have to bend down.

00:53:43.764 --> 00:53:45.093
- I know, that's okay.

00:53:45.093 --> 00:53:46.250
- Hi.
- This is Gavin.

00:53:46.250 --> 00:53:48.049
- Nice to meet you, I'm Fang.

00:53:48.049 --> 00:53:49.357
- And Kevin.
- Kevin.

00:53:49.357 --> 00:53:51.867
- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Good to see you.

00:53:51.867 --> 00:53:53.920
(Sheryl chuckles)

00:53:53.920 --> 00:53:55.962
- I can't believe we see Run-Yi tomorrow.

00:53:55.962 --> 00:53:57.101
- I know.

00:53:57.101 --> 00:53:57.934
- I know. (chuckles)

00:53:57.934 --> 00:53:58.852
(Fang murmurs)

00:53:58.852 --> 00:54:03.852
- Those are, these are all
ones that your mom sent me.

00:54:04.029 --> 00:54:06.885
That's what's hard about
this last year waiting

00:54:06.885 --> 00:54:08.734
is how much she's grown up.

00:54:08.734 --> 00:54:09.692
- [Fang] Yeah.

00:54:09.692 --> 00:54:11.197
- Especially since, I mean,

00:54:11.197 --> 00:54:14.247
normally you wouldn't
have all these pictures

00:54:14.247 --> 00:54:15.664
that we have had.

00:54:16.791 --> 00:54:18.708
And this is our family.

00:54:23.559 --> 00:54:26.226
That's Garrett and then Grayson.

00:54:28.756 --> 00:54:32.464
My husband and I adopted my
daughter Grayson who's now four

00:54:32.464 --> 00:54:35.047
in December of 2005 from China.

00:54:35.920 --> 00:54:38.970
And she was 11 months
old when we adopted her.

00:54:38.970 --> 00:54:42.970
And she was great socially
when we received her.

00:54:44.839 --> 00:54:47.143
But she was very delayed physically,

00:54:47.143 --> 00:54:49.869
which we expected could be possible

00:54:49.869 --> 00:54:52.352
with a child from an orphanage.

00:54:52.352 --> 00:54:54.308
After about four months,

00:54:54.308 --> 00:54:57.918
we went to our pediatrician
for just a regular well check.

00:54:57.918 --> 00:55:02.418
And he told us the word
spasticity and cerebral palsy.

00:55:03.693 --> 00:55:05.914
Spasticity is muscle tightness,

00:55:05.914 --> 00:55:10.748
which is a symptom of cerebral
palsy, which is brain damage

00:55:10.748 --> 00:55:13.350
to the gross motor portion of the brain.

00:55:13.350 --> 00:55:16.017
It was very scary and upsetting,

00:55:16.904 --> 00:55:21.441
but we found out that we can
manage it as, with our family.

00:55:21.441 --> 00:55:23.806
And we wanted to help
another child with CP,

00:55:23.806 --> 00:55:25.774
when we did adopt again.

00:55:25.774 --> 00:55:28.063
On Valentine's day 2008,

00:55:28.063 --> 00:55:31.534
I got an email from one of my Yahoo groups

00:55:31.534 --> 00:55:35.311
and it was just Hanni's story
about the little girl on pink.

00:55:35.311 --> 00:55:39.894
I said, "This is our girl." (chuckles)

00:55:41.980 --> 00:55:43.013
(Sheryl exhales heavily)

00:55:43.013 --> 00:55:44.143
(indistinct chatter)

00:55:44.143 --> 00:55:46.643
(tense music)

00:55:56.719 --> 00:55:57.751
- You're sweating down.

00:55:57.751 --> 00:55:58.770
(Sheryl laughing)

00:55:58.770 --> 00:55:59.603
- I know.

00:55:59.603 --> 00:56:02.103
(tense music)

00:56:09.556 --> 00:56:13.071
- The fact that Fang is
here is really also part

00:56:13.071 --> 00:56:17.341
of the miracle because Fang
is the one that, you know,

00:56:17.341 --> 00:56:20.489
saw something special
in her that August day.

00:56:20.489 --> 00:56:23.072
And without Fang's persistence,

00:56:23.992 --> 00:56:26.703
Run-Yi could maybe still
be in that foster home

00:56:26.703 --> 00:56:29.007
and having to sit in a
chair most of the day,

00:56:29.007 --> 00:56:31.424
definitely not being adopted.

00:56:32.393 --> 00:56:36.060
So, we have a lot of
love for Fang and Hanni

00:56:38.389 --> 00:56:42.115
and their family because of
what they've been for Run-Yi.

00:56:42.115 --> 00:56:46.698
Oh, they're there.
(indistinct chatter)

00:56:49.079 --> 00:56:50.823
(lady knocks door)

00:56:50.823 --> 00:56:52.240
- Can we come in?

00:56:54.447 --> 00:56:55.280
Ni hao.

00:56:57.408 --> 00:56:59.178
She is a little bit shy, but just-

00:56:59.178 --> 00:57:00.566
- It's okay, come in.

00:57:00.566 --> 00:57:02.102
(lady speaks foreign language)

00:57:02.102 --> 00:57:03.767
(Mr. Wong speaks foreign language)

00:57:03.767 --> 00:57:05.063
(lady speaks foreign language)

00:57:05.063 --> 00:57:06.730
- You can carry her.

00:57:08.653 --> 00:57:11.486
(Sheryl chuckles)

00:57:29.772 --> 00:57:33.105
- [Lady] Come in, come in, yes, come in.

00:57:34.849 --> 00:57:38.766
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:57:50.715 --> 00:57:55.465
- [Lady] She's looking around,
she's just looking around.

00:58:02.978 --> 00:58:06.895
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:58:13.142 --> 00:58:16.920
(Run-Yi's older brother
speaks foreign language)

00:58:16.920 --> 00:58:19.390
- [Sheryl] Just get this to her.

00:58:19.390 --> 00:58:20.641
- You guys still hear us?

00:58:20.641 --> 00:58:22.776
- [Sheryl] Yeah.

00:58:22.776 --> 00:58:23.776
- Hi Run-Yi.

00:58:24.613 --> 00:58:25.621
- [Sheryl] Say ni hao.

00:58:25.621 --> 00:58:28.862
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:58:28.862 --> 00:58:32.677
I've visited a lot of orphanages
and held a lot of kids,

00:58:32.677 --> 00:58:37.128
but I've never really,
other than my own adoption,

00:58:37.128 --> 00:58:39.211
seen an entire adoption.

00:58:40.369 --> 00:58:43.224
A huge shock to me was
how easily Run-Yi adjusted

00:58:43.224 --> 00:58:45.301
to her new family.

00:58:45.301 --> 00:58:47.664
(Sheryl speaks foreign language)

00:58:47.664 --> 00:58:51.723
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:58:51.723 --> 00:58:56.366
I don't want her to forget
what she's been through,

00:58:56.366 --> 00:58:58.360
even though it might be painful.

00:58:58.360 --> 00:59:01.912
And at times she may think
she should be ashamed of it.

00:59:01.912 --> 00:59:05.423
But I think if she holds on
to what she has accomplished

00:59:05.423 --> 00:59:09.181
in the past, she'll be
able to take one more step

00:59:09.181 --> 00:59:12.720
into the future and
really progress further.

00:59:12.720 --> 00:59:15.467
In any situation, but especially hers,

00:59:15.467 --> 00:59:19.419
because she's gonna have to
overcome a lot of things,

00:59:19.419 --> 00:59:21.784
she needs a lot of encouragement

00:59:21.784 --> 00:59:25.034
and she needs proof that she can do it.

00:59:25.899 --> 00:59:28.814
And she just needs to look at herself

00:59:28.814 --> 00:59:31.998
and know that she can because she has.

00:59:31.998 --> 00:59:33.320
(Fang knocks door)

00:59:33.320 --> 00:59:34.660
Hello.

00:59:34.660 --> 00:59:37.077
(door opens)

00:59:38.380 --> 00:59:42.297
(Fang speaks foreign language)

00:59:48.281 --> 00:59:50.120
(Run-Yi speaks foreign language)

00:59:50.120 --> 00:59:55.120
(Fang and Run-Yi speak
in foreign language)

01:00:23.849 --> 01:00:26.105
(Sheryl chuckles)

01:00:26.105 --> 01:00:28.706
It's a lot to think about.

01:00:28.706 --> 01:00:32.873
(Fang speaks in foreign language)

01:00:44.911 --> 01:00:47.494
(Run-Yi cries)

01:00:52.174 --> 01:00:56.341
(Fang speaks in foreign language)

01:01:04.492 --> 01:01:05.622
So I'm-
- [Sheryl] Okay.

01:01:05.622 --> 01:01:06.472
- I'll see you later.

01:01:06.472 --> 01:01:07.951
- Okay, thank you for all your help.

01:01:07.951 --> 01:01:10.534
(Run-Yi cries)

01:01:15.519 --> 01:01:18.102
(somber music)

01:01:22.820 --> 01:01:27.820
(Fang and her mom sing
in foreign language)

01:01:31.293 --> 01:01:34.966
- I really believe that
things happen for a reason.

01:01:34.966 --> 01:01:37.935
In Chinese, there's a word,
it's (foreign language)

01:01:37.935 --> 01:01:41.785
which means, it sort of means destiny,

01:01:41.785 --> 01:01:45.100
but it really means the
plan of the heavens.

01:01:45.100 --> 01:01:48.437
The purpose that the heavens have.

01:01:48.437 --> 01:01:51.868
And I don't believe
whatever's up there, you know,

01:01:51.868 --> 01:01:55.368
God or a greater power overlooks anything.

01:01:56.284 --> 01:02:00.844
And he definitely didn't
overlook this special little girl

01:02:00.844 --> 01:02:02.357
and he didn't overlook me.

01:02:02.357 --> 01:02:05.357
And so thank you whoever's up there.

01:02:14.213 --> 01:02:16.796
(guitar music)

01:02:18.834 --> 01:02:21.391
♪ Life is old there ♪

01:02:21.391 --> 01:02:25.087
♪ Older than the trees ♪

01:02:25.087 --> 01:02:28.683
♪ Younger than the mountains ♪

01:02:28.683 --> 01:02:31.432
♪ Growing like a breeze ♪

01:02:31.432 --> 01:02:35.265
♪ Country roads, take me home ♪

01:02:38.919 --> 01:02:42.041
- After the trip to Spain,
I stopped crew first

01:02:42.041 --> 01:02:45.757
and I pretty much stopped
because it was just too much.

01:02:45.757 --> 01:02:48.255
And I ended up switching into yoga,

01:02:48.255 --> 01:02:51.711
which was polar opposite in some ways,

01:02:51.711 --> 01:02:54.124
because crew, I had to be
on the ball all the time,

01:02:54.124 --> 01:02:57.135
responsible for everything,
taking initiative,

01:02:57.135 --> 01:03:01.900
being very verbal, and yoga, I
was just in charge of myself,

01:03:01.900 --> 01:03:04.034
just in charge of relaxing.

01:03:04.034 --> 01:03:06.831
So it was a really good change.

01:03:06.831 --> 01:03:08.716
(somber music)

01:03:08.716 --> 01:03:11.045
What I'm doing now is testing

01:03:11.045 --> 01:03:14.303
for the United States
Figure Skating Association.

01:03:14.303 --> 01:03:16.716
And it's kind of like karate, I guess,

01:03:16.716 --> 01:03:20.665
like you're kind of getting
your belt as you move up.

01:03:20.665 --> 01:03:24.169
It's not really competing
against other individuals.

01:03:24.169 --> 01:03:27.263
Sometimes it's kind of relaxing
because you can just be

01:03:27.263 --> 01:03:30.996
in your own world and you don't
have to engage with others.

01:03:30.996 --> 01:03:33.788
You can just think about
the different turns

01:03:33.788 --> 01:03:35.579
and the different positions.

01:03:35.579 --> 01:03:37.583
It's kind of meditative in that way.

01:03:37.583 --> 01:03:40.166
(upbeat music)

01:03:47.317 --> 01:03:49.734
(bell rings)

01:03:51.040 --> 01:03:52.096
- Hey Brooke, how are you?

01:03:52.096 --> 01:03:53.344
- I'm good.

01:03:53.344 --> 01:03:56.957
(indistinct chatter)

01:03:56.957 --> 01:03:59.091
- Can you just stop asking-
- [Boy] Are they Hispanic?

01:03:59.091 --> 01:04:00.531
- Questions?

01:04:00.531 --> 01:04:02.272
- Are you an adopted Asian?

01:04:02.272 --> 01:04:03.937
- I am an adopted Asian.

01:04:03.937 --> 01:04:05.117
- Where are you from?

01:04:05.117 --> 01:04:06.291
- I'm from China.

01:04:06.291 --> 01:04:07.792
- Are you from an orphanage?

01:04:07.792 --> 01:04:10.493
- Yes, that's not even a funny question.

01:04:10.493 --> 01:04:13.243
- You're just like, yes, exactly.

01:04:14.264 --> 01:04:16.509
- Oh my goodness, I swear.

01:04:16.509 --> 01:04:18.355
- I'm sorry, I'll stop.

01:04:18.355 --> 01:04:19.712
- Thank you.

01:04:19.712 --> 01:04:22.003
These are the times I wished I was white.

01:04:22.003 --> 01:04:22.836
(girl chuckles)

01:04:22.836 --> 01:04:23.669
- I'm sorry.

01:04:23.669 --> 01:04:24.552
- No, you're not sorry.

01:04:24.552 --> 01:04:25.385
- You are white.

01:04:25.385 --> 01:04:26.218
I dunno what you're talking about.

01:04:26.218 --> 01:04:27.051
- You are.
- I am white.

01:04:27.051 --> 01:04:27.884
- You're white.

01:04:27.884 --> 01:04:29.967
- I'm a freaking twinkie.

01:04:31.889 --> 01:04:32.990
- You good?

01:04:32.990 --> 01:04:33.823
- Yes.

01:04:33.823 --> 01:04:35.678
- Well, you gonna make the call?

01:04:35.678 --> 01:04:36.532
- Like right now?

01:04:36.532 --> 01:04:37.365
- Yeah.
- Sure.

01:04:37.365 --> 01:04:38.198
- Like right now, right here.
- Sure.

01:04:38.198 --> 01:04:39.402
- Okay.

01:04:39.402 --> 01:04:43.092
Okay, it's on hair for
three Chinese people,

01:04:43.092 --> 01:04:48.009
a girl and biological parents,
possibly biological parents.

01:04:51.735 --> 01:04:52.837
- [Haley's Sister] I have two-

01:04:52.837 --> 01:04:54.420
- Really that late?

01:04:55.476 --> 01:04:58.562
FedEx lost the shipment for three days.

01:04:58.562 --> 01:05:01.062
(Haley huffs)

01:05:02.753 --> 01:05:04.753
FedEx lost the shipment.

01:05:06.628 --> 01:05:10.118
- I waited 14 years, I
can wait a few more days.

01:05:10.118 --> 01:05:12.785
- [Haley's Sister] What a waste.

01:05:24.170 --> 01:05:26.920
- Oh, this is the sixth birthday.

01:05:28.272 --> 01:05:30.170
- There's Haley right there.

01:05:30.170 --> 01:05:32.283
- Oh, where's the team?

01:05:32.283 --> 01:05:34.913
- This is actually a young man we know

01:05:34.913 --> 01:05:38.163
and he, this was Haley's 13th birthday.

01:05:39.653 --> 01:05:43.208
And this was the DNA that we did, test.

01:05:43.208 --> 01:05:45.076
To prove that they were her family.

01:05:45.076 --> 01:05:46.159
- What time?

01:05:46.159 --> 01:05:48.409
Oh, that's October the 8th.

01:05:51.741 --> 01:05:54.271
- When I found out that
they were my birth family,

01:05:54.271 --> 01:05:56.589
like I said, I was kind of torn like,

01:05:56.589 --> 01:05:58.736
should I go back and see them or not?

01:05:58.736 --> 01:06:00.873
Because they didn't want
me in the first place.

01:06:00.873 --> 01:06:04.289
But then I thought about
like, if I don't go back now,

01:06:04.289 --> 01:06:06.249
I might not ever have a chance to again.

01:06:06.249 --> 01:06:09.500
And so, and knowing that
my birth father wanted me,

01:06:09.500 --> 01:06:10.546
that helped too.

01:06:10.546 --> 01:06:13.032
- [Haley's Mom] Since I was one of them.

01:06:13.032 --> 01:06:17.449
- Oh, this is a, it's going
to give it to the family.

01:06:20.609 --> 01:06:25.083
They're going to love
this, this is beautiful.

01:06:25.083 --> 01:06:28.502
- I'm excited to see my
birth father and my sisters

01:06:28.502 --> 01:06:30.280
because I've met them before,

01:06:30.280 --> 01:06:34.539
but I'm kind of nervous to see
my birth mother and I don't,

01:06:34.539 --> 01:06:36.540
I'm not really nervous
to see my little brother,

01:06:36.540 --> 01:06:40.010
but like she gave me up a long time ago.

01:06:40.010 --> 01:06:42.735
And so she might not really wanna see me,

01:06:42.735 --> 01:06:44.306
even though like she says she does,

01:06:44.306 --> 01:06:46.863
but it might be a little awkward, I guess,

01:06:46.863 --> 01:06:51.026
but I'm kind of nervous and
excited at the same time.

01:06:51.026 --> 01:06:54.004
- Oh, Jane, it's 20 after.

01:06:54.004 --> 01:06:55.384
You're gonna go down and get them?

01:06:55.384 --> 01:06:56.886
- I'm going to downstairs.

01:06:56.886 --> 01:06:58.939
I think they're, they
might be in the lobby.

01:06:58.939 --> 01:07:01.112
When I have them, I'm going to call you.

01:07:01.112 --> 01:07:02.612
- Oh, okay.
- Okay.

01:07:03.560 --> 01:07:05.591
- [Haley's Sister] Oh, (indistinct).

01:07:05.591 --> 01:07:07.954
(phone rings)

01:07:07.954 --> 01:07:09.404
- Okay, we'll see you in a sec.

01:07:09.404 --> 01:07:10.237
Okay, bye.

01:07:27.327 --> 01:07:28.323
- Hi.

01:07:28.323 --> 01:07:29.323
(Haley laughs)

01:07:29.323 --> 01:07:30.331
- Hi.

01:07:30.331 --> 01:07:31.410
(Jane knocks door)

01:07:31.410 --> 01:07:32.493
- Come on in.

01:07:35.449 --> 01:07:40.114
(Haley's biological mom
speaks foreign language)

01:07:40.114 --> 01:07:42.697
- She said welcome to Maanshan.

01:07:44.219 --> 01:07:47.794
(Haley's biological mom
speaks foreign language)

01:07:47.794 --> 01:07:52.211
She said, her language cannot
be understood by Haley.

01:07:54.387 --> 01:07:59.387
(Haley's biological mom
speaks foreign language)

01:08:02.713 --> 01:08:06.796
(Haley's biological mom sobbing)

01:08:43.830 --> 01:08:47.934
(chatter in foreign language)

01:08:47.934 --> 01:08:50.517
Take a shoot, take a shoot mom.

01:08:52.596 --> 01:08:56.679
And let me introduce this
is the younger brother.

01:08:59.366 --> 01:09:04.366
(Haley's biological mom
speaks foreign language)

01:09:07.776 --> 01:09:09.554
- May I please take your coat?

01:09:09.554 --> 01:09:12.196
(Haley's biological mom
speaks foreign language)

01:09:12.196 --> 01:09:15.458
- When she take off, they
prefer to hold by the hands.

01:09:15.458 --> 01:09:17.958
This is the Chinese way, yeah.

01:09:19.404 --> 01:09:23.237
(chatter in foreign language)

01:09:59.178 --> 01:10:00.961
They say, this picture is beautiful.

01:10:00.961 --> 01:10:02.016
- Thank you.

01:10:02.016 --> 01:10:03.338
- You have the beautiful picture.

01:10:03.338 --> 01:10:06.961
(Jane speaks in foreign language)

01:10:06.961 --> 01:10:10.049
- That's in Sunday school,
on church on Sunday morning.

01:10:10.049 --> 01:10:13.882
(chatter in foreign language)

01:10:17.357 --> 01:10:18.698
That's her second birthday.

01:10:18.698 --> 01:10:20.301
She's turning two.

01:10:20.301 --> 01:10:23.584
(Jane speaks foreign language)

01:10:23.584 --> 01:10:25.444
- They're talking about her hair is,

01:10:25.444 --> 01:10:27.340
two years old is already hair.

01:10:27.340 --> 01:10:30.007
(hopeful music)

01:10:50.571 --> 01:10:51.735
- When I was little,

01:10:51.735 --> 01:10:54.449
I would always think about
like meeting my birth family

01:10:54.449 --> 01:10:55.491
and we'd just talk all the time.

01:10:55.491 --> 01:10:56.368
They'd tell me everything.

01:10:56.368 --> 01:10:59.943
And then I forget that they
speak Chinese and I don't.

01:10:59.943 --> 01:11:02.199
It's kind of weird to get to know somebody

01:11:02.199 --> 01:11:04.404
on like the personal
level with a translator,

01:11:04.404 --> 01:11:07.815
but it would be nice if I spoke Chinese.

01:11:07.815 --> 01:11:10.720
- We wanted you to know that
we love Haley very much,

01:11:10.720 --> 01:11:13.457
very thankful that we
have her as our daughter.

01:11:13.457 --> 01:11:14.498
When she was little,

01:11:14.498 --> 01:11:17.488
she always asked if she
had any siblings in China,

01:11:17.488 --> 01:11:18.916
any brothers or sisters.

01:11:18.916 --> 01:11:21.844
And I always said, "Oh, I'm
sure you have a big sister

01:11:21.844 --> 01:11:23.873
and probably a little brother,"

01:11:23.873 --> 01:11:26.033
but we had no idea there were two more.

01:11:26.033 --> 01:11:28.145
(all laugh)

01:11:28.145 --> 01:11:32.066
We wanted to know who
actually abandoned her.

01:11:32.066 --> 01:11:37.066
(Haley's biological mom
speaks foreign language)

01:12:51.166 --> 01:12:53.060
- They have three daughters already.

01:12:53.060 --> 01:12:54.971
And this is the fourth one.

01:12:54.971 --> 01:12:56.315
And in the countryside,

01:12:56.315 --> 01:12:58.750
you have to try every way to have a son-

01:12:58.750 --> 01:12:59.583
- Of course.

01:12:59.583 --> 01:13:01.380
- Because you have the farm job

01:13:01.380 --> 01:13:05.001
and the son will be the
support of the family.

01:13:05.001 --> 01:13:07.655
And because in China we have, you know,

01:13:07.655 --> 01:13:11.297
the welfare system is not very good.

01:13:11.297 --> 01:13:14.547
If you are just getting older

01:13:14.547 --> 01:13:18.127
and the son is going to support you

01:13:18.127 --> 01:13:19.868
instead of the daughters,

01:13:19.868 --> 01:13:22.735
this is very popular in the countryside.

01:13:22.735 --> 01:13:24.902
Then they came to Maanshan

01:13:25.831 --> 01:13:27.932
and under the help of their friends,

01:13:27.932 --> 01:13:32.932
to the hospital to check and
through the kind of a checking,

01:13:33.574 --> 01:13:35.827
they know that she is a girl.

01:13:35.827 --> 01:13:40.327
But so, but before that,
they hope that this is a boy.

01:13:42.982 --> 01:13:45.586
No, but this is another girl.

01:13:45.586 --> 01:13:48.969
So abortion in China
is not against the law,

01:13:48.969 --> 01:13:51.814
but it's because it's too long,

01:13:51.814 --> 01:13:53.420
it could not do the abortion.

01:13:53.420 --> 01:13:57.170
And also the friends
and the big brother and,

01:13:58.438 --> 01:14:01.030
promised them that you can have this child

01:14:01.030 --> 01:14:04.027
because you can help her
to find a good families

01:14:04.027 --> 01:14:06.070
instead of the abortion.

01:14:06.070 --> 01:14:09.919
Then they say, okay, they will do it.

01:14:09.919 --> 01:14:12.105
- Did they give her a name?

01:14:12.105 --> 01:14:15.938
(chatter in foreign language)

01:14:23.369 --> 01:14:24.202
I got it.

01:14:24.202 --> 01:14:26.595
- [Jane] Yes, any the other questions?

01:14:26.595 --> 01:14:28.527
- Haley, you have any questions?

01:14:28.527 --> 01:14:29.360
- No. (chuckles)

01:14:29.360 --> 01:14:30.838
- Tim, you have any questions?
- They about covered it.

01:14:30.838 --> 01:14:32.588
- [Person] Thank you.

01:14:40.793 --> 01:14:42.991
- We're gonna go visit
my birth family's home.

01:14:42.991 --> 01:14:45.570
I'm gonna see where I could have grown up

01:14:45.570 --> 01:14:47.776
and I'm excited to get to know my sisters

01:14:47.776 --> 01:14:50.859
and their friends and my family more.

01:14:51.788 --> 01:14:53.529
(fireworks banging)

01:14:53.529 --> 01:14:55.228
(indistinct chatter)

01:14:55.228 --> 01:14:58.228
(fireworks banging)

01:15:12.096 --> 01:15:15.929
(chatter in foreign language)

01:15:42.940 --> 01:15:43.773
- I dunno, we-

01:15:43.773 --> 01:15:46.591
- Apparently I'm related
to everybody here.

01:15:46.591 --> 01:15:48.699
- All this is the neighbors.

01:15:48.699 --> 01:15:49.859
(fireworks banging)
(indistinct chatter)

01:15:49.859 --> 01:15:50.709
- [Haley's Mom] Close you up.

01:15:50.709 --> 01:15:52.325
(Haley laughing)

01:15:52.325 --> 01:15:55.275
(indistinct chatter)

01:15:55.275 --> 01:15:57.387
- He's scared you are cold.

01:15:57.387 --> 01:15:59.237
So you keep this button up.

01:15:59.237 --> 01:16:00.424
(Haley laughs)

01:16:00.424 --> 01:16:02.003
(Person laughs)

01:16:02.003 --> 01:16:05.086
(indistinct chatter)

01:16:06.334 --> 01:16:07.167
- Is this your room?

01:16:07.167 --> 01:16:09.000
- Yeah, we lived here.

01:16:11.069 --> 01:16:16.069
when I starting high school,
Qin, Li and me lived here.

01:16:16.147 --> 01:16:17.323
It was our bedroom.

01:16:17.323 --> 01:16:19.684
You can see all kinds of drawings.

01:16:19.684 --> 01:16:20.909
- So you all shared this room?

01:16:20.909 --> 01:16:23.365
- Yeah, so there was two, there are,

01:16:23.365 --> 01:16:25.056
there were two beds here.

01:16:25.056 --> 01:16:28.260
One is, the big one is
here, the small one here.

01:16:28.260 --> 01:16:30.609
And there are two desk here.

01:16:30.609 --> 01:16:32.186
We study here every night.

01:16:32.186 --> 01:16:34.372
(Haley and her biological sister chuckle)

01:16:34.372 --> 01:16:38.826
- My oldest Chinese sister
is Juan and she's 24.

01:16:38.826 --> 01:16:39.890
She speaks English

01:16:39.890 --> 01:16:42.161
and she's getting her
masters in chemistry.

01:16:42.161 --> 01:16:43.780
(Haley and her sisters laugh)

01:16:43.780 --> 01:16:46.192
The second one is Li and she's 22.

01:16:46.192 --> 01:16:49.182
And then there's Chen who's 19.

01:16:49.182 --> 01:16:52.420
And then Meng He's 12. (chuckles)

01:16:52.420 --> 01:16:53.753
- Haley, cheese.

01:16:55.226 --> 01:16:56.679
Okay, thank you, good.

01:16:56.679 --> 01:16:58.154
(indistinct chatter)

01:16:58.154 --> 01:16:59.342
It's time for lunch.

01:16:59.342 --> 01:17:01.094
(indistinct chatter)

01:17:01.094 --> 01:17:03.338
In China, we sit over the table.

01:17:03.338 --> 01:17:06.005
(hopeful music)

01:17:46.872 --> 01:17:51.002
(Jane speaks foreign language)

01:17:51.002 --> 01:17:54.085
(indistinct chatter)

01:17:59.042 --> 01:18:02.292
Mother is going to give Haley, help you

01:18:04.279 --> 01:18:06.570
to get the bones out and you can eat,

01:18:06.570 --> 01:18:08.516
but you don't have to eat them all,

01:18:08.516 --> 01:18:11.406
can left something there
if you don't like it.

01:18:11.406 --> 01:18:13.280
This is in the country side.

01:18:13.280 --> 01:18:17.530
- The chicken was killed
by ourselves, the chicken.

01:18:18.532 --> 01:18:21.199
(hopeful music)

01:18:30.562 --> 01:18:34.487
(Haley's biological father
speaks foreign language)

01:18:34.487 --> 01:18:36.782
- Daddy says that if
you come to China again,

01:18:36.782 --> 01:18:38.757
please come to my house.

01:18:38.757 --> 01:18:39.590
- [Haley's Mom] Yes-

01:18:39.590 --> 01:18:41.050
- And to be the visitor again.

01:18:41.050 --> 01:18:41.985
(Haley's biological father
speaks foreign language)

01:18:41.985 --> 01:18:42.818
(Jane speaks foreign language)

01:18:42.818 --> 01:18:43.651
She say, thank you.

01:18:43.651 --> 01:18:44.759
(hopeful music)

01:18:44.759 --> 01:18:46.366
- Thank you for the day.

01:18:46.366 --> 01:18:47.913
(Jane speaks foreign language)
Thank you so much.

01:18:47.913 --> 01:18:51.355
(indistinct chatter)

01:18:51.355 --> 01:18:52.188
- Bye bye.

01:18:55.168 --> 01:18:56.483
- Goodbye.

01:18:56.483 --> 01:19:00.373
(indistinct chatter)

01:19:00.373 --> 01:19:02.547
(Haley speaks foreign language)

01:19:02.547 --> 01:19:05.214
(hopeful music)

01:19:14.270 --> 01:19:15.103
- Goodbye.

01:19:15.103 --> 01:19:15.936
- Goodbye.

01:19:18.053 --> 01:19:21.970
(Jane speaks foreign language)

01:19:23.201 --> 01:19:24.266
- Bye bye.

01:19:24.266 --> 01:19:26.933
(hopeful music)

01:20:17.856 --> 01:20:19.104
- Bye.

01:20:19.104 --> 01:20:21.771
(hopeful music)

01:20:50.880 --> 01:20:52.056
- [Haley's Sister] Hi.

01:20:52.056 --> 01:20:52.889
- Hi.

01:20:52.889 --> 01:20:54.812
- Are you from Chinese?

01:20:54.812 --> 01:20:56.722
- Yeah, I am.

01:20:56.722 --> 01:20:58.555
- You came a long way.

01:20:59.483 --> 01:21:01.713
- Oh, I'm Chinese.

01:21:01.713 --> 01:21:06.106
I come from Pennsylvania,
does she know states?

01:21:06.106 --> 01:21:07.876
- Well I went,

01:21:07.876 --> 01:21:10.626
well, I came from Hunan province.

01:21:14.447 --> 01:21:15.280
- Really?

01:21:15.280 --> 01:21:17.022
- All the way to here.

01:21:17.022 --> 01:21:19.988
I wanna show her my panda backpack.

01:21:19.988 --> 01:21:21.655
- Oh panda backpack.

01:21:22.637 --> 01:21:23.720
- I love you.

01:21:25.169 --> 01:21:28.891
Sit down and crisscross, apple sauce.

01:21:28.891 --> 01:21:30.737
- Don't you wish you had a little sister?

01:21:30.737 --> 01:21:32.502
- Thank you.

01:21:32.502 --> 01:21:34.881
Okay, what do you wanna do now?

01:21:34.881 --> 01:21:37.548
- I dunno, what do you wanna do?

01:21:40.113 --> 01:21:42.788
- And that's my sister
and my little brother

01:21:42.788 --> 01:21:44.871
and my China mom and dad.

01:21:47.310 --> 01:21:50.142
- After I found my birth family
and I heard the whole story

01:21:50.142 --> 01:21:52.206
of how I came to be here,

01:21:52.206 --> 01:21:55.483
it just made me think that
there's a reason that I'm here.

01:21:55.483 --> 01:21:57.847
I'm not sure what it is yet.

01:21:57.847 --> 01:21:59.671
And I'm not gonna go out
there and tell everybody,

01:21:59.671 --> 01:22:02.324
"Oh, go look for your birth
parents because I found mine."

01:22:02.324 --> 01:22:04.843
But some people don't wanna find them.

01:22:04.843 --> 01:22:07.579
And some people really, really
want to, but they can't.

01:22:07.579 --> 01:22:11.326
And so each situation is very different.

01:22:11.326 --> 01:22:15.143
So I would say to somebody,
if they wanted to find them,

01:22:15.143 --> 01:22:18.369
then go for it, but if
they don't wanna find them,

01:22:18.369 --> 01:22:20.843
then that's their choice
and they don't have to.

01:22:20.843 --> 01:22:21.676
So, yeah.

01:22:23.387 --> 01:22:25.470
And he's a small guy too.

01:22:27.815 --> 01:22:30.023
- When Haley found her birth family,

01:22:30.023 --> 01:22:33.111
my first reaction was I guess,
jealousy, but of course,

01:22:33.111 --> 01:22:35.026
like I was happy for her, you know,

01:22:35.026 --> 01:22:36.891
'cause she's been wanting
it for a long time,

01:22:36.891 --> 01:22:40.225
but it did leave a little
bit of a lasting moment of,

01:22:40.225 --> 01:22:42.193
oh, now I wanna find my family.

01:22:42.193 --> 01:22:43.934
'Cause you know, I've
kind of always told myself

01:22:43.934 --> 01:22:47.892
it's impossible, especially
'cause it's China.

01:22:47.892 --> 01:22:51.828
Meeting other adoptees,
it really, it helped my

01:22:51.828 --> 01:22:54.910
like understanding of how
other people feel about it.

01:22:54.910 --> 01:22:57.073
I'm pretty much any other teenager.

01:22:57.073 --> 01:23:00.119
But when you have those
moments of self doubt

01:23:00.119 --> 01:23:02.465
and feeling unwanted just
'cause you were given up,

01:23:02.465 --> 01:23:03.722
'cause you have other
people who understand

01:23:03.722 --> 01:23:05.150
what you're talking about.

01:23:05.150 --> 01:23:07.491
So that's always nice to have.

01:23:07.491 --> 01:23:10.285
- These are, that was me just guessing out

01:23:10.285 --> 01:23:11.118
what I looked like.

01:23:11.118 --> 01:23:11.951
This is from picture.

01:23:11.951 --> 01:23:14.033
I was gonna do one like
from a mirror down here.

01:23:14.033 --> 01:23:15.403
Then I just gave up.

01:23:15.403 --> 01:23:16.938
- Is that your Chinese name?

01:23:16.938 --> 01:23:17.771
- Yes.

01:23:17.771 --> 01:23:19.550
- That's really easy,
I'm very jealous of you.

01:23:19.550 --> 01:23:21.195
- It's really easy, but I still messed up.

01:23:21.195 --> 01:23:24.121
So I put the water by it and
hopes no one will notice.

01:23:24.121 --> 01:23:28.660
- I think I got the most
complicated Chinese name ever.

01:23:28.660 --> 01:23:32.523
My China dad named all of
the children so he named me.

01:23:32.523 --> 01:23:35.812
And my Chinese name is Ju Yuan,

01:23:35.812 --> 01:23:38.667
which is Ju is their family name.

01:23:38.667 --> 01:23:43.667
And then Yuan means like having
two families or something.

01:23:44.116 --> 01:23:47.153
Having a better Chinese name
and having a Chinese name

01:23:47.153 --> 01:23:51.425
by my China family is
just, it means a lot to me.

01:23:51.425 --> 01:23:54.092
(hopeful music)

01:23:56.513 --> 01:23:59.259
- All of us, this whole
adoption community,

01:23:59.259 --> 01:24:03.589
we have this commonality
about us, this unity.

01:24:03.589 --> 01:24:06.471
We're sharing two cultures
and all these common threads,

01:24:06.471 --> 01:24:09.796
but at the same time,
we're each at our own place

01:24:09.796 --> 01:24:11.092
in our own journey.

01:24:11.092 --> 01:24:12.363
(upbeat music)

01:24:12.363 --> 01:24:14.212
It's sort of like a
journey going backwards

01:24:14.212 --> 01:24:16.274
because it's a journey of our past.

01:24:16.274 --> 01:24:17.857
It's our road home.

01:24:20.294 --> 01:24:21.748
And we each have our own road

01:24:21.748 --> 01:24:24.373
and our own path set out for us.

01:24:24.373 --> 01:24:27.292
We don't need to worry about

01:24:27.292 --> 01:24:29.513
how other stores are compared to ours.

01:24:29.513 --> 01:24:31.220
(somber music)

01:24:31.220 --> 01:24:34.303
(engine bus revving)

01:24:37.776 --> 01:24:39.162
(Fang chuckles)

01:24:39.162 --> 01:24:40.746
(Fang speaks foreign language)

01:24:40.746 --> 01:24:45.472
(baby shouts)
(Fang chuckles)

01:24:45.472 --> 01:24:48.722
- My journey is to find more of myself,

01:24:50.237 --> 01:24:52.562
find more of my past.

01:24:52.562 --> 01:24:54.820
In my world, an ideal world, you know,

01:24:54.820 --> 01:24:56.435
Fang topia like my little planet.

01:24:56.435 --> 01:24:59.877
It would be a mix between
America and China.

01:24:59.877 --> 01:25:03.431
And it would be most of China,
you know, all the vendors,

01:25:03.431 --> 01:25:08.098
the food and the weather from
America and the clean air.

01:25:10.163 --> 01:25:13.773
And also I would have
my biological parents,

01:25:13.773 --> 01:25:17.589
somehow meshed together
with my adoptive parents.

01:25:17.589 --> 01:25:19.917
(somber music)

01:25:19.917 --> 01:25:22.602
But there's no Fang topia.

01:25:22.602 --> 01:25:25.475
So, there's only the world.

01:25:25.475 --> 01:25:28.058
(somber music)

01:25:35.613 --> 01:25:36.853
(indistinct chatter)

01:25:36.853 --> 01:25:37.805
- [Camera Person] Just turn her around,

01:25:37.805 --> 01:25:39.075
there's mom and daddy.

01:25:39.075 --> 01:25:42.158
(indistinct chatter)

01:25:43.923 --> 01:25:47.256
- [Linda] My daughter, Ruby is now five.

01:25:48.960 --> 01:25:49.793
- Hello.

01:25:52.266 --> 01:25:54.679
- [Linda] She loves dinosaurs, fairies

01:25:54.679 --> 01:25:56.861
and knows she's gonna be an astronaut.

01:25:56.861 --> 01:25:58.471
- Hey, what is that?

01:25:58.471 --> 01:25:59.994
- It's a kite, you wanna try it?

01:25:59.994 --> 01:26:02.661
(hopeful music)

01:26:04.938 --> 01:26:07.062
- [Linda] I've learned that
there are no clear answers

01:26:07.062 --> 01:26:08.062
to give her.

01:26:09.658 --> 01:26:11.730
Ruby's journey will be her own.

01:26:11.730 --> 01:26:14.897
And the questions will be hers to ask.

01:26:19.700 --> 01:26:23.367
(Chinese traditional music)